Link and I went down the entrance when he suddenly stopped me and said, "That was some crap that you pulled back there. Don't you realize that you might get in huge trouble for threatening Mido?"
"Well yeah, duh," I snapped. "We needed to get passed him so we can see this damn tree."
"What did I say about cussing?"
"Oh Link, bite my ass."
I walked passed him and he followed. I felt bad for him for a little while, but Link needed to have more faith in me. I didn't plan on killing Mido, just scaring him and then the kid had to go and pass out. What kind of leader does that?
Anyway, at the end of this path was this huge tree. It looked like it had a moustache or something, but it was fairly obvious that he was a tree.
"Link, Ashley, is that you?" the tree boomed.
"Yes," Link said.
"Is Navi and Maximus still with you?" the Deku Tree asked.
"Yes sir," said Navi.
"Oh, yeah, I'm here!" shouted Max. He pulled off my hat trying to fly and speak to the Deku Tree. He started shouting, "But oh no, Deku Tree, it seems I have gone blind. What should I do!"
Seriously, I thought. I grabbed the end of my floating hat and reach inside to pull out Max.
"Oh, wait," Max said. "I can see...again."
The Deku Tree laughed at the situation, but stared to cough violent...or at least I think he did. I had never heard a tree cough before, so I guess I can't say he coughed, but at least, for your sake my reader, I can guess.
"Forgive me, my children," the Deku Tree said. "I have become fairly ill."
"Why, sir?" Link asked.
"I have been befallen by a curse of mass proportions," the Deku Tree said. "Inside of me, there is a monster and it has caused me much harm."
"Well, what can we do?" I asked gently. "We can't let you die."
"Dear child, my end is close, I will not lie to you," the Deku Tree stated sadly. "However, I need to test the courage of you two before I give you my most prized possession."
"What is it?" Link asked.
"You'll figure out in due time," the Deku Tree said, "but for now, I need you to face the evil inside of me."
The Great Deku Tree opened up his mouth. It creaked as it went down. I could tell that this tree was extremely old. Link and I would have to work fast to save him from the curse inside of him. But, the two of us had never used a sword or shield before, so I knew that this was going to be an interesting mission.
"Navi and Max, please guide these children," the Deku Tree said. "Link and Ash, listen to what Navi and Max have to say. They are full of much wisdom, even if they seem...childish."
Max sighed, embarrassed from his ‘blind' situation.
"Good luck, my children," the Deku Tree said. "The fate of Hyrule lies now in your hands."
Thanks for letting us know, I thought.
Link and I looked at each other and nodded. We started to walk forward. I hadn't seen any enemies, but I knew that there had to be some in the Deku Tree otherwise, whomever laid that curse was pretty bad at doing it.
I unsheathed my sword as we walked in, preparing for the worst.
The Great Deku Tree was huge, but the inside looked even bigger. It was extremely overwhelming for Link and I. Of course, there were enemies around. These jerk flowers called Deku Babas were popping out of there buds and trying to bite us. When I was little, I could never get by those dumb piranha plants in Super Mario and these things were definitely much uglier. So, I decided to get my bottled plant anger and used it to open a can of wup-ass on the things.
Luckily for my inner child, after a couple of seconds, another Deku Baba would sprout from the same bud, so I would get to kill them over and over again.
Link, however, didn't see this as being too amusing, so he started to climb up some vines. I didn't noticed until I felt a seed hit my head. I looked up and there was Link wielding a slingshot. He waited just until I noticed him to fire another one that hit me right one the forehead.
"Hey, what the heck is wrong with you?" I shouted. He showered me with more seeds. Instead of just packing the pouch in the middle with one seed, he started to pack four or five. I was swatting them like an idiot while that little bastard just kept laughing and shooting more.
He stopped, falling to the ground laughing.
"All right you inattentive little asshole," I snapped, "go ahead and shoot one more of those things. I dare you."
After a couple of seconds, I shouted, "Yeah, that's what I thought, you coward."
Link stood up, still smiling and said, "It's not that I'm a coward, it's just that I ran out of seeds."
"Alright, well, I'm coming up there," I said, "I'll let this incident slide, but this is the only time. Next time, I will totally kick your butt."
I didn't want to climb up the vines, so I climbed up the ladder as carefully as possible. I realized that I started to get rather good at the whole ladder climbing business. I had no time to celebrate, however, for I had to jump over to a platform, which I had never done before. I started to feel my heart race as I looked below me. A Deku Baba was looking right up to me. I bet he was waiting for me to fall and become his lunch.
"C'mon Ash!" Link shouted across the dungeon. "We don't have all day here."
"Um, just give me a second," I said.
"Alright, well, I'm going to go ahead and go in this door back here," Link said, pointing to a door as he walked backwards. "I emptied out a treasure chest on this floor and it had two slingshots in it, so meet me up in the next room and I'll give it to you."
I nodded as he went in the door. I took a deep breath and looked back down at the Deku Baba. He was licking his lips now and drool was hanging from his mouth.
"You know Ash, you're going to have to face your fears," said Max, flying out of my hat. He flew over to the platform and said, "Here, just try to jump over here. It's not as hard as you think."
I looked at my feet. My legs were rather wobbly. I took a deep breath and jumped. I closed my eyes as I went in the air and felt my feet land firmly on the ground. I opened my eyes and saw Max right in my face.
"Good job," Max said. "Now, let's go catch up with Link and Navi."
I ran passed some vines and went straight to the door. I wanted to be one step ahead of Link, not him be ahead of me. I just would rather have me be over confident and get hurt rather than he be over confident and get hurt. Link seemed like a nice kid.
I reach the door which, oddly enough, didn't have a doorknob. But, as I got close to it, the door automatically opened.
Wow, this place is technologically advanced, I thought.
I entered this empty room where a dead plant had was laying.
"That's a Deku Scrub," Max said and he flew over to it. "By the looks of it, I'd say that Link killed it."
I nodded and went to the door on the other side of the room. It was also an automatic door. That room ended up being a rather medium sized room. There was a huge dip in it, however, so when I entered, I had to sit down and then jump off the ledge. But, I didn't check for Link at all while I was up there.
That was no biggy though, because there was a ladder in front of me that led up to another platform. Before I climbed it, I found two slingshots on the floor. I started to get scared and shouted hoarsely, "Link, where are you?"
I heard a sharp, "Hey," above my head and looked up at the ceiling. Intertwined in a huge spider web was Link and Navi, but Link seemed to be unconscious.
"Navi, what can I do?" I asked.
"Get a slingshot and destroy the Skulltula over there," she said.
"What's a Skulltula?" I asked, and before Navi could answer, Max yelled, "Ashley, hurry! Get the slingshot and kill that thing."
Crawling down the wall where that ladder was came a huge spider, but it's opisthosoma had a shell on it that resembled a skull. Out of everything in the world, reader, my biggest fear are spiders especially big spiders. No where back in Ohio were there huge, mutant spiders and if there were, they definitely didn't have the image of a skull on their opisthosoma.
(But, pardon me, reader, for I suppose you might not know what an opisthosoma is...it's the fancy word for a spider's abdomen. Why didn't I just use the word abdomen, you might ask. Well, that's only because I've never used that word in my life before and this will probably be the last time I will use it, too. At least I could use a bit of my useless education for something...and also use it to be a total smart ass.)
I froze. There was no way I could kill that thing, let alone look at it. It crept me out way too much, and maybe you might think I am a baby, reader, but spiders make me freeze up, no matter what kind they are or what size.
Navi's sharp voice brought me back to reality, though, and the next thing I know is that this Skulltula was on it's back two legs and the other six were spread wide. I could see it's fangs ready to dig into me. I had no time to grab one of the slingshots on the ground, so I quickly unsheathed my sword and shoved it into the Skulltula's soft, underbelly. Blood went everywhere and the Skulltula let out a horrible noise. It went backwards and shriveled up.
What did I do next? I screamed extremely loud and started to cry. I curled into a ball, too, hiding my face from the terrible, skull backed spider. I didn't like it inside the Deku Tree and as far as I knew, Link was either unconscious up in that web or stone cold dead.
"Hey, Ashley," Navi yelled.
"What?" I said through my hunched up legs.
"C'mon, you need to get Link and I out of this junk," she said.
"Is that thing dead?" I asked.
"What thing?" Navi said.
"That damn, son of a bitch, shitty spider!" I shouted at the top of my lungs, through my legs, of course.
"Yes, he's dead," Max said. "Calm down, he's dead."
"He?" I said, looking right at Max. "You know his gender?"
"Well, no, but you need to be courageous, for the fate of Hyrule," Max said calmly. "It might be hard, even if it's conquering a fear of spiders, but you were chosen to do this out of everyone in your dimension. You're good at this."
"They drew my name out of a hat," I mumbled, but I stood up.
"What?" Navi and Max both said.
I grabbed the slingshots and climbed up the ladder. The huge Skulltula was still shriveled beside it, but I ignored it the best I could. Then I said, "My name, and the names of other worthy nominees, were put in Mario's hat and then someone just pulled a name. I wasn't chosen because of my abilities, I was chosen because my name was just coincidently close to whomever pulled the name."
Max and Navi seemed disheartened when I told them this, so I added, "Just please, don't tell anyone, especially Link. I feel like I've cheated the ‘fate of Hyrule' as you call it, but I still have to try and fix it."
"I understand," Navi said.
I picked up a seed that was lying on the ground and stood behind a lit torch. I shot the seed, which caught on fire and hit the web. The web burned up because of the fire and Link fell. Navi flew down to him as soon as she was released.
"Ash," Max said, "you should shoot this down."
Max was flying by a ladder that was randomly hooked to the wall. I gathered some more seeds and shot the two hooks at the top and the ladder fell, staying perfectly vertical when it landed.
"Nice," I whispered aloud.
I climbed down the ladder quickly to the bottom, which was where Link was. Navi and Max were there trying to wake Link up. Link had some dirt on him from the fall and some scratches on his arm.
"Navi, what happened?" I asked.
"Well, we walked in here and everything was fine, then that Skulltula fell on me and Link," Navi said. "I guess the weight of the Skulltula made Link pass out when it fell on him. I just got caught in the web."
"I'm glad I decided to catch up," I said. Link was lying on his side, so I turned him over so he was on his back. I brushed off some dirt that was on his face and stood up. I walked away a bit and then filled the pouch of my slingshot with five seeds and shot them at Link's face.
"Whoa, get off me, get off me!" Link shouted, wiggling around like a fish out of water.
"Aw Link, you're fine," I said.
Link stopped wiggling and shot a look at me and shouted, "You jerk!"
"Hey, if it wasn't for me, you'd be dead right now," I said. "You would've been spider food, my friend."
"Spider food," Link said. He took off his floppy hat and scratched his head asking, "What happened to me?"
"A Skulltula fell on you and it made you pass out," Navi said. "It scared me half to death!"
"Ashley, you saved...me?" Link said, emphasizing the me in his statement.
I gave him a weird look and said, "Should that even be a question? Of course I saved you. What, did you think I was going to just leave you up there to die?"
Link looked to the side and I rolled my eyes.
"C'mon, let's just wrap up this whole thing," I said. "I'm tired of the stupid spiders already. We better not run into anymore."
"Oh my God, I hate this place so much!" I shouted.
Link and I had left the room and were climbing up vines to reach the third floor of the Great Deku Tree. I didn't particularly like the dumb vines and I had lost footing twice so I was sweating really bad. The thing was, the damn Skulltulas liked to climb on vines and just spin around there, making these dumb sounds. I had been thrown off twice already and there was one just right above my head.
Link, of course, was already on the third floor. He was looking down at me as I struggled.
"How's it going?" he teased.
"Aw, shut up," I said. "You try being terribly afraid of spiders and climbing vines and have to be with them both at once."
"I swear something is wrong with you, Ash," Link said.
I waited for the right moment to take off because if that Skulltula saw me, I was dead. The dumb thing didn't spin like the rest of them, so I assumed I was safe.
"Well, Link, I have what you call severe anxiety," I said.
"Yeah, it's when you're scared of everything, or well, rather let me rephrase that...it's when you're nervous about everything."
"This must be terrible for you then," Link said.
I made it passed the stupid Skulltula and got my feet planted safely on the third floor. This was the last floor in the Deku Tree and you could see the tip up on the ceiling. Unlike the second floor, this floor went around in a circle and there was a huge opening in the middle of floor. If Link or I fell down the opening, we'd be dead, seeing as we'd land right on the first floor. Around the edges, however, were spider webs, so we'd be safe even if we walked close to the edge.
There was a room down that hallway, which I won't even bother describing because it had really nothing in it, just a stupid compass. We explored all the floors and didn't know what to do at that point.
"So, what now?" I asked. I was rather bothered. I just wanted to get out of that hell hole.
"I'm not sure," Link said, "but we need to hurry. The Deku Tree could die at anytime."
I turned to face him, "Well, maybe if someone didn't get caught by a spider, this would've been wrapped up already." I started to walk backwards a bit. I knew that there were little platforms along the side that overlooked the first floor, so I wanted to look all cool.
But...there was something I didn't notice...
"Hey, it's not my fault, you're the one that's afraid of everything," Link snapped. "Maybe if you looked behind you, you would pee your pants, seeing how high up we are."
"I know how high up we are," I said. "I just walked backwards to get away from you. You're screwing this whole adventure up."
"Oh whatever, you were the one sent to help me," Link said. "Therefore, you should do as I say and keep your mouth shut."
"Over my dead body," I said and I held out my arms. C'mon, get some, I thought.
Remember, my reader, that I said I forgot to look at one thing. Well, that one thing was right above me; waiting for the opportune moment to come falling on me. That thing was a Skulltula and the split second I was think: C'mon, get some, this thing ran into me, doing that annoying spinning stuff.
Because the thing spun, I was propelled off the platform and I started to feel myself fall.
"Ashley!" Link shouted. I don't know what he did, but he killed the Skulltula and I saw him looking down the platform.
Great, I thought, the last face I get to see is his ugly mug.
Why was I thinking this at such an intense moment, I would have no idea. I'm scared of spiders, ladder, walking down stairs, and rubber bands, but death? Death never scared me. I closed my eyes and decided to take it all in. I felt myself go through a bunch of string like things and the next thing I knew was I had just fallen into water.
The worst thing to fall into and not know it was water. I took in a lungful of that stuff and dreaded it. I floated back to the surface and swam to a thing of land. I laid there, coughing up my lungs. I even puked water, which was extremely disgusting.
After I was done with the water, I stood up and, at that exact moment, I got covered in more water because Link decided to jump from the third floor down to where I was at. He, of course, was ready for the water and dove like one of those swimmers in the Olympics back at home.
I took off my hat and rung the water out of it as Link swam over to me.
"That was close," Link said. "I thought you were a goner."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah," I said, rolling my eyes. "C'mon, get out of that kiddy pool and let's go. As you said up there, we need to hurry."
I decided to turn my hat one more time, this time really hard to get the water out of the fabric. Then I heard this squeal.
"Oh, shoot," I said, "sorry Max, I didn't know you were in there."
Max flew out, soaking wet.
"Yeah, whatever, let's just go," Max said. "I'm really tired."
"Me too, buddy, me too," I said.
That day, my reader, I realized that these ‘temples,' as they were called, were the most boring things in the world. Every room we walked in had something to do with a puzzle and it left Link dumbfounded. There was one room we walked in that had these pink eggs hanging from the ceiling. Lucky me, they decided to hatch while I was standing right under them so I got slime all over my brand new tunic.
The eggs had these annoying creatures in them that just jumped out at you just to knock you over. I used my shield to knock them back and then slice their butts and Link started to do the same.
It wasn't long before we got to the final basement in that place. There were three of those Deku Scrubs in front of us and they were pelting us with nuts. There was one anxious Deku Scrub in a previous room who spouted out this: "Twenty-three is number one." And the thing just kept yelling that until we eventually left the room.
Link, as usual, went in full force and just started to kill the suckers, but they kept coming back. I mulled the ‘Twenty-three is number one' sentence over and over in my mind and finally got it.
"Link, stop!" I shouted. He looked at me and got shot in the face by a Deku Nut. "Get back here so you don't get hurt again."
Link walked backwards to me, repelling more Deku Nuts with his shield. The Deku Scrubs quit shooting once he got back with me and stared at us.
"Alright, remember that one, crazyass Deku Scrub?" I asked.
"Um, don't cuss place, but anyway, yes," Link said.
I shot him an are-you-serious look and continued, "Well he kept shouting twenty-three is number one."
"I thought it was twenty-one is number three," Link said.
"Well, that's just ‘cause you're dumb," I said. "Here, I'll try this."
I kept my slingshot in the back pocket of my tunic's skirt. I pulled it out and reach in a little pouch around my waist and got some seeds. I packed some seeds in my slingshot and shot the second Deku Scrub, then the third and finally, the first. The first guy started to run around like a little pansy.
Link decided to grab him, so he ran forward and grabbed the thing by the leaf on his head. The Deku Scrub was wiggling around, trying to escape Link's grasp. He looked terrified.
"Please, if you promise to let me go, I'll tell you a secret," the Deku Scrub said.
I walked up to where Link was and looked at him. He was smiling so I said, "Alright, Mr. Scrub, shoot."
"Well, to administer the coupe de grace to the Queenie, paralyze her by shooting seeds at her, then slash her eye with your sword," the Deku Scrub said quickly.
I nodded at Link and he let the Deku Scrub go. It returned to it's bud and burrowed inside it.
"The ‘Queenie'? Navi said.
The bars on the door in front of us disappeared so we could enter.
"I bet that the Queenie is in that room," I said, "and I have a feeling she won't be as nice as she sounds."
"Well, I guess this is it," Link said and he walked towards the door. "Let's get this show on the road."
We both walked in together, unsure about what would happen next.
Reader, I wasn't sure how all this happened, because it happened rather fast. The ‘Queenie' was actually a big spider like thing named Queen Gohma. It had armor and everything, though. Only her eye was left open for us cut. We figured out that if we shot a seed in her eye, she ended up paralyzed and that gave us an opening attack.
Sounds easy, right?
Well, after we hit her eye the first time, she collapsed on the ground. I turned to Link and smiled and, surprisingly, he hugged me. What we didn't know was that ‘ol Queenie actually had a trick up her sleeve. She waited for the right moment and then grabbed me by the waist and pulled me away from Link. Then, the old bat decided to climb up a wall and hang on the ceiling right above Link.
Link looked up at me like I was stupid, so I said, "I'm glad that you're mesmerized by the warm embrace you just shared with me, but can you get my ass down from this bitch?"
"Uh, yeah," Link said and he took out his slingshot and started rapid-firing those damn seeds again. But the Queen was covered in armor, so the seeds were just bouncing off of the armor, either that or they were hitting me instead.
"Hey genius, I don't think it's working," I shouted.
The Queen was getting angry I guess, because she started laying eggs all over Link. He was getting slimed by stuff coming out of the Queen while she was giving birth all over the place. Then the eggs started hatching and Link was screwed, the poor guy. I was trying to get out of the Queen's claw, but it wasn't working.
"Ash, what should I do?" Link shouted.
"I don't know, hit her uterus!" I shouted.
"What's a uterus?" Link asked.
"Nothing, just get me down from here, please!"
After the Queen ran out of eggs or whatever, she stopped birthing her babies all over Link and decided to just go back on the ground. Thankfully, she left her eye open wide just for Link and he shot it.
Laying there paralyzed, I broke free and Link decided to run toward me, so I yelled, "What are you doing stupid? Hit the Queen while she's paralyzed."
It was too late though. The Queen had recovered and started to climb up the damn wall again.
"Great, here we got with the eggs again," I said. Being the genius that I am, though, an idea popped in my head. I took a rock by my feet and packed it in the pouch on my slingshot. It was a lot bigger than the little seeds we had been using.
"When the Queen gives birth, her eye glows!" Link said. "Good job for coming up with the idea of hitting her eye while she's up there."
"Oh sir, I am not aiming for her eye," I said.
I decided to aim for...well, her baby dispenser...I had a lot better aim than Link did at shooting stuff with slingshots, so I got the rock right up in...dat, I guess...and, well, I think I plugged up her ovaries because, after awhile, the Queen exploded into a thousand pieces. Of course, all of her guts and slime covered me and Link, but it was worth it.
"That was disgusting," Max said. "You would've saved my appetite if you would've just shot her eyeball and killed her the right way..."
"Well, I'm just a bit more creative than you are, is all," I said.
This glowing light appeared out of no where in the middle of the floor. It was a light blue tint and made a really pretty sound. The dungeon had been locked when we entered and it was still locked, so I assumed that that was our way out. Link and I approached the light, looked at one another, and entered it. It was really bright, but it lifted us up. There was a suddenly spark and I suddenly felt my feet touch a pad of grass.
My sight returned and I saw the Great Deku Tree. Link landed safely beside me.
"Welcome back, my children," the Deku Tree said. "I hope my curse wasn't too much of a burden."
"It very much was," I mumbled, but Link nudged me.
"Dear children, please sit down, for I have a story to tell you before I go," the Deku Tree said.
"Where are you going?" I asked.
"Child, my end is near," the Deku Tree said. "I will soon be dead. Now, sit down so I can give you the last bit of my wisdom."
Link and I sat down. I was a bit pissed that I saved this Deku Tree just so it could still die, but I knew I'd get over it. The Great Deku Tree seemed extremely wise, so I was all ears for him.
"What I tell you is very important," the Deku Tree said. "The land of Hyrule was created by three goddesses, Din, Farore, and Nayru. These three appeared when Hyrule was nothing but chaos and made it to the land it is today. With her flaming arms, Din created what is now the red of the earth. With her rich soul, Farore created the life of those that would uphold the law in Hyrule. With her wisdom, Nayru created the spirit of law that would keep this world from going into chaos.
"Before they all departed, they made a plan. They would create a Sacred Realm and in that Sacred Realm would be the true form to govern all. That form is the Triforce, made of the Triforce of Power, Triforce of Wisdom, and the Triforce of Courage. The Triforce can be obtainable, but the fate of Hyrule depends on who has the Triforce. If one with a righteous mind has hold of the Triforce then Hyrule will live in peace but if one with an evil heart obtains the Triforce, all will be lost."
"So, what does that have to do with us?" I asked.
"Link here has been a child I have always kept my eye on," the Deku Tree said. "It is said that the Goddesses had a back up plan for the matter if one with evil intentions got a hold of the Triforce. It says in ancient scriptures that a hero will be born, whether it be before or during or after the chaos, a hero will be born that will save Hyrule and restore to it peace. Ashley, I am glad you are here to accompany Link, but I don't know if you will be allowed to go as far as Link will. I have faith that Link is the hero and if he is, you might have to step back and let things happen."
I trusted Link and all, but I felt bad that I would be left out of the mix, especially since I didn't choose to be there in Hyrule, or away from my own home for that matter.
"Is someone evil after the Triforce?" Link asked.
"Yes," said the Deku Tree. "His name is Ganondorf Dragmire and he is the one who plagued me with this curse."
I suddenly remembered Ganondorf. He was the one who comforted me back before I met Link and got wrapped up in the mess.
"Ganondorf possess the power of horrible black magic and causes chaos where he goes," the Deku Tree said. "I think that you two can stop him. You both have a lot of courage and for that, I feel I can trust you with what Ganondorf tried to get from me before he laid this curse upon my branches. Take this, the Kokiri Emerald."
The Deku Tree wiggled his branches and a stone came from his leaves. Link and I stood up and actually caught it at the same time.
"Never lose sight of this stone, my children," the Deku Tree said. "This stone will be one of three stones that you will need to unlock the key to destroying Ganondorf. Before you get the next two stones, however, you need to go to Hyrule Castle and see the princess of destiny. She will guide you further."
"We won't let you down," I said.
"I have faith in you both," the Deku Tree said, "but I will not be able to see you succeed. I can feel my life slipping away as we speak. I am almost dead. Please fulfill my wish and be the guiding light of Hyrule."
"Great Deku Tree," said Max, "don't go."
"I have to my fairy child," the Deku Tree said. "Max and Navi, never give up on these two and never let these two give up. You will navigate the future of Hyrule just as much as these two will. Don't let me down, my children."
The two fairies nodded and then we began to hear a creaking noise. The Great Deku Tree turned a light blue. Death had crept upon him. The two fairies huddled close as a way to comfort each other and I looked at Link.
"We should go," he whispered.
"Yeah, guys, c'mon, let's fulfill the Great Deku Tree's wish," I said.
The fairies followed us. Even though the Deku Tree was just a tree, I felt extremely bad and I bet Link felt the same. He put his arm around my shoulder because, I'll admit, I started to get tears in my eyes.
We had to fulfill the Deku Tree's wish and I would personally take that Ganondorf man down for doing what he did.
I promised myself I would...