Usually, the most deadly thing we use the broom for is to get the occasional
stray cat out of the house. Now, people ask me, "What can I use my broom
for?" The answer is simple. Go down to the blacksmith shop. Now, in a town
emergency, the town usually comes together. Go down to the shop, and ask
him to make some spear-heads. Have him make them to a certain size. After
affixed to the broom, don't take the brush off the broom. The brush will
stabilize the broom-spear in flight, and will cause it to hit your target
almost every time. Also useful for dropping out of a window, and impaling
invaders in the head.
Now, these need to be sharpened, and the pole shortened, unless your strong
enough to weild it to fight. These are deadly in the right hands, and are
excellent last-minute weapons.
Ahh, the pitchfork! A common misconception is that the pitch fork is one
of the last-minute weapons that doesn't needed to be changed. Wrong! The
Pitch fork is rather dull, and needs these steps to make it truly battle-ready:
Flattening. The pitchfork's end is slightly curved, and needs to be straightened.
Sharpening. The pitchfork needs also to be sharpened. And after those steps,
the pitchfork is finally battle-ready.
To make the scythe battle-ready, you have to follow these steps, or otherwise
you're better off running. Sharpening. Sharpen, sharpen, sharpen! Remember,
if it has a metal end, it needs to be sharpened. The scythe tends to dull-down
after chopping lots of crops. Shorten. The scythe is made to hack a large
area of crop. We need to shorten it down to about two and a half feet,
so you can wield it in one hand. Follow these steps, and you've got something
almost as good as a short sword.
Now we move to a
different part. We are now moving to stuff that are almost weapons, and some are
weapons. We will explain in this part about: Poker iron, Wood axe, metal pipe,
kitchen knives, and hammers and other common tools.
The poker iron, that thing that all people with fireplaces have. You have
to do nothing to this to make it a weapon. Just make sure its head is on
securly. Use it to smash somebody in the head or shin.
The axe, the one item already a weapon. You need to sharpen this. Also,
it is long and heavy, shorten it down. War axes have only small heads,
and only a hatchet doesn't need to be shortened. Also, make sure the head
stays on. It is no good if the head flies off.
Sharpen your knives. You can use them in defense of your home, or as a
All you need to do is to make sure the head stays on and that it is short
enough so it is not to clumsy to wield.
The weapon used by the common thug on a budget. All you have to do is make
sure that it isn't too long so that when you swing it you get off-balanced.
How to make armor.
In this section, we will talk about how to make armor in a hurry, out of common
Plate armor. If
you need something that will well-protect you, but are on a budget, buy
a bunch of shovels. Take off the metal-end, and take of the metal extension
that connects it to the wooden shaft. Then put a hole in it, and begin
to bind it to a tough, thick jacket. Put large ones on the shoulders, and
on the chest area. Put smaller ones on the stomach area. Don't forget the
back. Overlap real small ones on the back, so that it provides flexibility.
Use small garden shovels for the forearm, and the upper-arm.
Explosives. At this part, we will talk
about how to utilize deku nuts and other explosives to make weapons of mass
destruction. We all know the power of a deku nut. Here, I will show you how to
use there destructive power in odd but useful ways.
Deku Spear Gun.
What you need is a: Small metal pipe, about ten inches long, bag of deku
nuts, and a spear head on a small wooden shaft, about eleven inches long.
Gently put the nut in the tube. Then, quickly put the spear in the gun.
The nut explodes, so hold on tight, otherwise it will drive the tube through
your stomach. The spear is ejected at a incredible velocity, and will go
for almost six hundred feet before it drops to the ground. It can drive
through the thickest armor, and is deadly. With four or five nuts, and
a pitchfork or a broom-spear with the brush taken off, and a tbe about
six-feet long, you have a very deadly weapon.
All you have to do is affix a deku nut to the end of arrow, and when it
hits, it will cause the flesh to explode.
Easier than the Arrow, but less range,
and less accuracy. With bunches of these, you can wreak mass destruction.
Deku bomb. Put
about ten-to-thirty nuts in a container, and put a fuse on it, and put
something flammable that will light when the fuse is done burning. With
this, you can blow up a massive area.
Now this completes
the civilian warfare handbook.
Dedicated to the Shiekah, who could have been
saved and lived many more years with this information.