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By: Anonymous

Link just turned twenty-two this morning. He looked at himself in the mirror. He had no idea that this week, for anybody else, would be heaven. However, for Link, sweet little, 22-year-old Link, it was hell. Link never had to think about who he liked before, but by the end of this week, he would have to think about that more than anything else.

Zelda said she had a suprise for him. Link was still looking in the mirror. It was odd how things turned out. When he was growing up, Link thought he had the funniest looking features. He was quite strong, but didn't show it. His legs used to look funny-looking in those tights, but now he finds every woman looking at him on the way by. He had got his ear pierced, and there was no other word for it. He was cool now. Every time he goes to Saria's for breakfast, all the Kokiri girls look at him on the way by. Link had got used to this, but in the beginning, it started drive him nuts.

Link got up, and went to Saria's house. The usual stares accompanied him. Once or twice a month, a Kokiri 'bumped' into him, and would ask him out to dinner, or to have lunch with them, and he would have to carefully explain that he was Hylian, and since she was a Kokiri, it would never work out. Luckly for Link, Saria never had tried to ask him out. Link made it to her house without any offers made to him.

They had a peaceful breakfast, and told Link that Jamei was planning to ask him out. "She has been psyching up for it for weeks," Saria had said between bites of berry. "She said she was going to try tommrow. "

"It's like a sport with them." Link finished up his fish, and left. He saw Jamei, and smiled at her. She turned red and then ran back into her house. Link left for the castle. He got there, and there was something different about it. There didn't seem to be the usual flow of traffic that a castle usually has. All of a sudden, a servant comes out, and catches a glimpse of Link. His eyes get wide, and he zoomed back inside. Link got suspicous, and drew his Kokiri sword. He got ready to strike in case something decided it wanted to kill him.

He went inside, and he went quietly into the dining hall. It was devoid of life, except for what looked like a feast on a table that had been set up. Then he got a funny prickling feeling on the back of his neck. He could feel hundreds of eyes on his neck, and he could feel the tension, feel their breathing, feel their heartbeats... HAPPY BIRTHDAY LINK!!! was yelled by about a hundred people, who had hid behind decorative plants, armor, and draping. Link was scared out of his wits, and flung his sword some thirty feet into the air, and recovered himself in time to catch it and sheath it in one motion.

Zelda came up to him. She hugged him and said happy birthday. Link ate about all he could (probably a first.). "You havn't seen the real suprise yet," she said, and led him to her room. He had been here before. "Now, Link, close your eyes, and don't open them untill I say so." He sat down on her bed and closed his eyes. She, however, took off all her clothes. "Ok, open them" she said, and he opend his eyes.

"WHOA!!!" Link yelped in surprise, and his eyes went as big as saucers. He was completly shocked, even more than when he entered the dining hall thinking that maybe Gannon had taken over the castle again. Zelda moved towards him, smiling.

"Here's your suprise. Why so shocked?" she said, and moved towards him, whille Link moved away, unsure as what to do. This isn't happining. This isn't happining, he thought, and then bolted for the door. He opened it, and who else, there was Impa. Link was horrified, terrified, and every other bad feeling in existence. Impa then saw Link, and Zelda. Her eyes flitted from Zelda to Link, and then she backhanded him as hard as she could. Link was knocked against the opposite wall.

She tried to yell at Link, scream at Link, but she was so overcome with emotion that all that came out was "You leave the princess alone," in a deadly whisper. She moved toward Link, her face red with rage. She tryed to kick him as hard as she could while he was down, but he rolled out of the way, and pulled out his sword. He got to his feet, and wiped the blood away with his free hand.

"Impa, listen, it is not what you think," Link said, trying to reason with her. But he rage seemed to blind her thought process. She pulled out two daggers, and attacked Link. Link was doing his best trying not to kill her, or get killed himself. Impa wasn't as quick as he was, and Link was able to dodge her fairly easily. But Link was starting to slow, and Zelda was watching from her bedroom, terrified. She had gotten dressed. I had to do that. I thought for sure he would take me. Impa is going to kill him. Zelda stepped out into the hall and both there heads turned. Impa took advantage of the moment and swiftly moved behind Link and put the knife to his neck.

"Impa let him go, NOW!!!" she yelled, and Impa snapped out of her rage. "Impa, I tricked him! I thought this would be the perfect opportunity to get him alone," she said, and she started to cry. She was so ashamed of herself. Impa let her guard down for half a second, and Link put an elbow into her stomach, and she bent over wheezing. Link then darted down the stairs, and quickly raced down the stairs. Everybody looked at him on the way out, and king Harikinian grabbed a hold on Link's scabbard.

"Are you leaving your own party?" he asked cheerfully.

Link spun around, with tears in his eyes, and shame in every feature. "I'm sorry, but I have to leave," he said, and was unable to look Zelda's father in the eyes. Link ran away, crying, he ran as far as he could, then managed to stagger the rest of the way to the forest. It was just after lunch, so most of the children where inside taking naps. He made his way to Saria's home, and went inside. Saria was taking a nap, and Link went and sat down on the end of her bed, and began to cry. Saria woke up, and saw Link at the foot of her bed, and it sounded like he was crying.

"Link are you ok?" she asked, sitting up to get a better look at him. He looked at her, and the shame hadn't diminished. He then told her of going up to the castle, the suprise party, and then when Zelda told him to come upstairs with her, and then about Zelda taking off all her clothes, then Link leaving, about Impa coming to see why they left, and then she saw Zelda and Link, and then she went into this rage, and then they fought, how Zelda came out, then Impa used her as a diversion, put the knife to Link's throat, and then Zelda told Impa the truth, then Impa let her guard down for a second, about hitting her in the stomach, and coming back.

"You're not to blame," she said in a very soothing voice she used to use when he used to whack his knee on a rock when he would trip. That voice always made him feel better. "I guess, she just wanted to show you her real feelings." Link thought about it, and that was the kind of person that Zelda was. Instead of telling you, she wanted to show you in her own 'special' way. "You could go back and tell her you have no bad feelings, and for her to tell you her feelings openly," she said. "Do you have feelings for her?"

Link searched himself. He found feelings of love, but it was the love of friendship. "She is my friend, but no more," Link said, and stopped his crying. But something Saria said was starting to echo in his head just wanted to show you her real feelings. "I guess I better talk to Zelda." said Link, and left the house. He went back to his house, and got his hookshot and his slingshot, and a handful of deku nuts. He left, and made his way back to the castle. Link got there, and went back inside. The party was still going, most people had thought he went outside for a little bit of fresh air, after all, he was only gone about an hour.

Link saw Zelda, and went up to her. "Hi, Zelda!" he said, and she spun around. Her eyes widened at the sight of Link, and she began to try to get away. Link grabbed on to the back of her dress, and spun her back around to him. Zelda looked him in the eye, and began to cry. "Zelda, I forgive you. I understand why you did it, and I forgive you. Just try to keep Impa from killing me." He said, and smiled a little bit.

"Link, I." she began, but Link cut in.

"You don't have to apologize. I already said I forgave you," he said. "We are still friends. Only friends, but still, friends," he said. "Here, give me a hug" and hugged Zelda tight. Link let go, and turned around to see Impa. Link's eyes widened real big, and he began to step back, afraid of another attack by the enraged nanny.

However, she smiled and said, "I'm sorry, for jumping to conclusions, and trying to kill you." and shook Link's hand.

"It's ok, as long as you can forgive me for the blow to the stomach."

"Sure," she said, and the enjoyed the rest of the party. However, deep inside Zelda didn't want it to be that way. She wanted Link, loved Link. She would do anything to get him. I will get him to come around. I just stunned him. I will get him to come around, she thought. And then it was then that they decided it was time for presents. Link then went over to a large table stacked up with packages. Link began to rip at paper, getting to his presents. He got a bunch of different things, one a small rug (from Zelda, she saw his little house before, and wondered how someone could live in something so, well, not decorative.) A Goron sword from the king (if he knew what happened earlier, he would probably trying to kill Link with it) with the inscription 'For defending our kingdom from Ganon' on the hilt of the sword. Link unbuckled his Kokiri sword from his back, and put the Goron sword in it's place. He then put the Kokiri sword on his belt around his stomach.

As for half of it, he could give it to Saria. It had too much flowers on it for him. Also, there was too much of it there for him to carry home. Impa got a carriage, and two horses. She took him to the edge of the forest. When she stopped, she turned around and started to talk to Link, "What happened, Link? All she would tell me is that she had done it hoping you would like her. You know her. If it is worth it, she'll do it."

Link began to fidget uncomfortably. "I know. When she did it, I was more shocked than when I entered the castle this afternoon. I left the room as fast as I could, and I saw you, and I was terrified. When I got home, I talked to Saria. You know her, she's my friend. Well, she convinced me that it wasn't my fault, and I came back. However, before I did, I got my hookshot, a handful of deku seeds, and my slingshot. I was hoping that you hadn't told the king, or otherwise I probably have to leave he kingdom," Link said.

"Link, do you like Zelda?" Impa asked, and Link began to fidget again.

"Only as a friend," he said. Impa helped Link carry in his stuff. "Hey Saria! Come and look at all the new stuff I got!" Link said, and got her and brought her to his house to show her the mounds of stuff. "Here you can have this stuff, and these fancy plates." He said, and gave her most of the stuff.

"No, Link, you keep it. It's your birthday." she said, and began to put it down.

"No, you keep it. I don't' need that stuff, and it has been forever that I have eaten a meal here at my house," said Link, and helped her take the stuff to her house. It was true. Link almost never ate here, because he always had breakfast, lunch, and dinner with her. "Do you have anything for me?" he asked. Saria looked in her dresser, and got out a small box with the wrapping paper made out of green deku leaves sewn together. Link pulled of the leaves, and looked inside. In there was a rolled-up drawing of Link when he was a little boy. By the look of it, it was made when he was seven.

"Awww, you where so cute!" she teased.

Link then sat down and looked at it. "When did you make this?" he asked.

"It was right after your seventh birthday. You had begun to practice with that Kokiri sword, and I made this when you where practicing," she said.

Link rolled it up and looked around. "You can give me this too, and then I would have somewhere to put it!" Link said, and pulled out a large portrait from the pile of stuff he had just given to Saria.

"That would be fine," She said, and looked at the happy expression on Link's face. "I know what! I will go visit Malon! Maybe she has a present for me!" Link said happily, and ran to his house and hung up the painting on a wall opposite his bed, and just leapt from the door of his tree house, did a double flip, and began to walk excitedly toward Lon Lon ranch. Link loved getting presents. It made him feel wanted, which he never was through most of his life.

Link arrived at the ranch. Malon had just got done with her evening chores, and was washing her hands outside. She saw Link approach, and she brightened up quite a bit. She had not told anybody this, but she had a big crush on Link the day she met him, and that was around the time Link thought that he was the funniest-looking. "Guess what day it is!" he said.

"I don't know, Saturday?" she tried, hopefully.

"No, it's my birthday!" he said happily. "Did you get me anything?"

"Uhh.." She said, and her face turned red.

"Oh, that's ok!" he said. Malon had to go inside. She had to use the bathroom real bad. She began to fidget, and Link began to wonder what was wrong. "Are you o.k.?" he asked.

"Yes," she said, and tried not to fidget. She liked to spend time with him. She began to walk towards the ranch house, and Link began to talk to her. Link told her about the time that he had fell in the wash pond at Kokiri forest, and a bunch of them where washing clothes. He fell in, he swallowed a bunch of bubbles, and he got the hiccups, and for about an hour afterwards he hiccuped bubbles. Malon began to laugh hard, but then stopped, because if she laughed anymore, she ran the risk of using the bathroom right there in her dress.

She suddenly began to run towards the house, and Link followed her. "Where are you going in such a hurry?" he asked, running along side of her.

"I have to use the bathroom really bad," she said, and increased her speed. Link stopped running, and watched Malon in amusement, her dress whipping in the wind. Link then noticed how pretty Malon was while running, and wondered why he had never noticed it before. He also felt something else, something indescribable. He felt as if he wanted to sweep Malon up in his arms. So now, Link had a crush. Only he didn't know that Malon felt the same way.

Link walked up to the house, and went inside the wide-open door. Link sat down at the kitchen table, and stared out the window. About two minutes later, Malon came out, but in a new dress, not one all dirty. Link saw her and stood up. "So, what do you want to do?" he asked, because he was full of energy, and he doesn't like to sit around when he is all hyper. They went by the small pond where the cows go to drink and where they sit in the shade in the afternoon. They brought some bread for the ducks that come there.

After a while, the just ended up staring at each other. Before they knew what happened, they where kissing each other. They just sat there, holding each other in there arms after awhile, and started to stare into each other's eyes. They did this for almost a half-hour without doing anything else. Then Malon said something, "What are you looking at?" she asked, although she was doing the exact same thing.

"I was just wondering how I knew you all this time and never loved you before," Link said. "I have to go, it's getting dark," Link said, and began to get up.

"No, don't go, watch the sunset with me," she said, and pulled him back to the ground. The where laying on the side of a small hill by the pond, and they had a perfect view of the sunset. "Isn't it beautiful?" asked Malon, but Link was looking at her hair.

"The sun makes it look like your hair is on fire," he said, and held up her hair. Indeed, when he let it fall back down, it looked like a waterfall of fire. "Ok, now I have to go," Link said, and gave Malon a kiss goodbye. Link walked away, and exited the ranch.

He was almost to the entrance to the forest when six men in black clothes came out from behind some bushes. "Hello, how are you today?" Link asked cheerily, but then they pulled out two-and-a-half foot short swords out of there belts, and advanced on Link.

"Give us your money, and we will let you live." said one who looked like the leader, and had a sword 3 feet long. Link was slightly amused. He had taken on tougher things. Link reached behind his back and pulled out his new Goron sword. It was heavier than what he was used to, but he could wield it in one hand if he needed to, even though it was 4 feet .

"How about you leave, and I won't chop you up," Link said. The thieves laughed, and charged Link. They weren't very good at sword fighting, they were used to stabbing and cutting people's throats. Link disarmed all the thieves except for the leader. Link stood there, watching him. It dawned on the leader that he was going to lose. The leader then began to run. Link picked up a fairly large rock, and lobbed it at the leader. It whizzed through the air, then thump, it hit the thief in the head.

"Ow, son of a." then another rock whizzed by. He then tucked tail and ran, until he was out of sight. Link then walked the rest of the way to the Kokiri forest. Saria was outside tending one of her small vegetable patches.

She saw Link and walked up to him. "Link where have you been?" she asked, with her hands on her hips.

"Oh, you know, the usual. Went to Malon's, then came back here, got jumped by thieves, then came home," he said in a tone that seemed to say that that kind of thing happens all the time.

"Link are you ok?" she asked, and began to look Link over in the dim light, but she couldn't see much. However, Link did have a small gash on his arm, but Link didn't know it was there. "You have a cut on your arm, Link," she said, and led Link into her house. She then got some rags, a towel, and some herbs from a small table on the far side of the room. She wiped his arm off, and then wrapped up his arm after putting the healing herbs on the wound. "How did your time at Malon's house go?" she asked, and Link told her all of what happened. "Well, I am glad for you. It is about time," she said.

"What do you mean, 'about time?'" he asked indignantly.

"You're twenty-two. I was just saying that it was about time that you had a girlfriend, that's all," she said, defensive.

"Oh, sorry. What's for dinner?" he said. They ate dinner, and Link then went to bed, totally exahusted by the day's activities. His mind spun with thoughts. I am in love with Malon. I hope Zelda doesn't get jealous. I love Zelda, too, but only as a friend. I hope she understands. I wouldn't want to lose one of my best friends over this, thought Link, and he drifted off to sleep.

The next morning, he had forgot about those thoughts and decided to go over to the castle. He had breakfast with Saria as usual, and he left her house, and was halfway through the Kokiri town, when all of a sudden Link tripped over something that went EEKK! Link fell flat on his face, then he sat up and came face-to-face with Jamei. "Hello, Jamei," he said, dreading what it meant to when they 'accidentally' bumped into him.

"Hi Link! Sorry about that. There is something that I want to ask you." she said, and her face began to turn red, but then Link cut in.

"Listen, Jamei, there is something that you need to hear," Link tried to say, but then Jamei cut back in, and Link was helpless.

".Link, would you like to go to dinner with me sometime?" With that, she couldn't look Link in the eyes anymore, and her face turned an even brighter shade of red.

"Listen, Jamei, I have a girlfriend," Link said.

Jamei was shocked. "Is it that Saria?! I will go beat her up!!!" she began to say, and she was now starting to go even redder with anger.

"Jamei, she isn't a Kokiri, she's Hylian." Jamei calmed down, and her face turned back to it's normal color.

"Is it the princess?" she asked innocently.

"No, her name is Malon. Her father owns Lon Lon ranch. We are in love, and besides, I am Hylian, you are a Kokiri. It just wouldn't work out," Link said, and Jamei plopped down on the ground, and began to cry.

"I never get any breaks." she mumbled between sobs.

Link knelt down beside her. "It's ok. Here, give me a hug," Link said, and picked her up right off her feet and gave her a big hug. She stopped crying, and gave Link a little kiss.

"Bye-bye, Link," she said happily, and skipped off. Link was confused why she was suddenly so happy, but then he heard a rustling. Link looked over at where the noise came from, and saw a large cluster of girls hiding behind it. They where giggling madly, and doing there very best to try to contain it. They saw Link and they bust out laughing, and began to run off, still giggling.

Link then took about ten steps, and came face to face with Malon. "Hello, Malon!" Link said cheerliy.

Malon then said, "I saw those little girls."

"You're not going to get jealous over a few little girls, now, are you?" Link asked.

"Oh, be quiet. Is that the fist time that a little child has asked you out?" Malon asked in disbelief.

"About the three hundredth. Also, Jamei is about two years older than I am."

Malon was taken aback by that statement. "But.But she is a little child!" she said, in even more disbelief.

"Malon, Kokiri never grow up. My friend Saria is about a year and a half older than I am. However, she doesn't look a day over the age of ten," Link said.

"Oh, ok," Malon said. "You where on your way over to see me, right?"

"No, I was on my way to see the princess," Link said.

"Well, can I come with you? I have always wanted to see the castle," she asked.

"Of course." They went to the castle, and a servant escorted them in, and called on the princess. She came down, and saw Malon.

"Who is this, Link?" she asked.

"I'm Malon; I'm Link's girlfriend," Malon said. Zelda's heart dropped.

That was why he didn't want me. He already had a girlfriend. If I can drive her away from him, He will be mine for sure, but I have to do it dsicreetly. Yes, Link will be mine. He is just fooling himself with that red head. He will see that I am the one he loves. I will make that red head pay for trying to take him away. He will be mine. "Nice to meet you, Malon," Zelda said, and forced a smile, like she does when the king had visitors, or when he has dinner parties.

Link went up to Zelda and whispered in her ear, "Are you ok with this? You had your 'dinner party princess' smile and voice." Link's voice turned into a pleading tone, "Please, Zelda, don't ruin this. Also, please don't tell Malon your little 'stunt.' I love her, Zelda. I love you too, but only as a friend. If you try to ruin this, I don't think I will be able to trust you anymore, and I don't think I could be your friend after trying to do something like that," he said, and pulled back.

Zelda nodded, and she had to fight back tears. He has been the best friend I have ever had, I am going to be real secretive, otherwise I will lose my only true friend, she thought, and then said, "Would you like a tour of the castle, Malan?" she asked.

"It's 'Malon', and yes, I would," she said sweetly. Link and Malon walked behind Zelda hand-in-hand, and Zelda did her best to not lash out and try to kill Malon.

"And this is the guards armory, and this is Impa's office, and this is my room, and..." Zelda droned, doing her best to ignore Link and Malon, and it was the point to where if they needed to get her attention, they would have to yell.

"Malon, is this boring you?" Link whispered into her ear.

"Yes, very," Malon said. Zelda was beginnig to enjoy this. Malon seemed slightly bored with the tour when she started it, and the more monotonous she was, the more bored Malon was. Zelda now was so boring, that Malon was starting to nod off while walking, and did it when they went up some stairs. She had tripped, and almost busted her head open. However, Link had caught her just in time. The more bored Malon was, however, the more interested they became in each other. Zelda had stopped at a certain point, because she realized that if she continued to get even more boring, they would probably start making out in front of her.

Zelda stopped paying attention to them entirely, and began to drone on, and never looked back to see if they had any questions. "Malon, do you want to get away from her? We can go into Zelda's room, I'm sure we can use it, as long as we don't get 'too carried away,'" Link whispered into her ear, with a sinister smile.

"Okay, but how are we going to get away?" she asked.

"Wait untill we get to some stairs, there are some going down into paperwork storage coming up very soon," Link said, and about four seconds later, they came to the stairs, and Zelda went down the stairs, but without Link and Malon. They quickly backtracked to Zelda's room, and ducked inside, they began to make-out on her bed.

Meanwhile... "And this is where they keep the records for people who have given us money. Now that ends our tour of the castle, do you have any... HEY! WHERE DID YOU GO?!?! COME BACK HERE!!!" she yelled, and began to search the castle for the two. She knew what they where probably doing, but she wanted to rest. So she went back to her room, and stepped inside, and immediatly took off her shirt and saw the two of them in her bed. Her covers where kicked off, and Malon was naked from the waist up. They where both asleep.

Zelda put her shirt back on and poked Malon awake. "Huh? Link, is that... Oh, princess..." she said, and jumped out of bed. She was terrified. A trickle of wetness began to drip on the floor, then started streaming visibly down her right leg below the line of her dress when Zelda said these terrible words.

"What are you doing here in here?! This is my room! You have better not have done anything, or I will have you arrested!" Zelda said, and gave Malon her blackest look. Malon began to grope behind her, her shoes were off, and a puddle was accumulating at her feet. Zelda was enjoying tormenting her and she tried to get the rest of her clothes quickly, but she was interupted by Link.

Link then sat up and said "Oh, hi Zelda!" Link said, unembarrassed. He then sat up, and put his feet right in Malon's still-growing puddle. "Eww, Zelda, did you spill some water?" he asked, then Malon turned around. Wetness was still streaming through her panty-hose, and Link saw it, and the look of horror on her face. "Oh, honey! Zelda wouldn't be mad at us for just making-out in her room, I am sure she has done it before," Link said, and looked at Zelda.

Zelda blushed, because, unlike Link, she has had about six or seven boyfriends since she was sixteen. At that time, she was seeing a son of the captain of the guard, his name was Kwijibo (He was very handsome and very sweet, he was a lot like Link). The feeling of horror was replaced tenfold with shame. She had wet herself, and she was twenty-three! She had terrible bladder control when she was scared or stressed, and sometimes she even lost control of her bowels, but that was only in extreme situations. Unfortunately, this was one, and she had just emptied them. She remembered once, she was feeding the chickens, and a bull got out, and cornered her against a fence. Her clothes where so soiled that her father had to burn them, because he couldn't clean them.

Tears began to go down her cheeks, and Zelda secreltly smiled inside. She could use this to her advantage. If she was lucky, Link would be disgusted by her. And she crapped her pants, also! This is so great! She wets herself, and top top it, even when she didn't have a top on, she poops!!! I can even smell it!!! Link will be mine by the end of the day, but I have to be quiet about this. If Malon catches on, I could kiss Link goodbye, that is if he stays around long enough for me to do so. Link could tell that her accident had been caused by fright (he knew about the bull incident).

"I...I'm s...s...sorry if I d...disgust you," she managed to sob out, then tried to run out of the room, but slipped on her own puddle, and whacked her head hard on the wooden bedknobs at the end of the bed, and landed on her butt with a really gross-sounding squish.

"Eeewww, gross," Zelda said, and a smile flitted across her face, but she hitched it back at once. Link, however, didn't notice the squish, Zelda's comment or smile, and rushed down to her side. She was unconcious, but her cheeks where still wet with tears. Link then picked her up carefully in her arms, and put her on the bed. Link then told Zelda to get Impa. Zelda said yes, but thought maybe Impa won't be in her office.

I can wander around for a while in places I know she would never be, and maybe Malon will die! Wait, no, Link would know if I did that, he knows this castle as well as I do. I guess I could get Impa, and plan something later. I hope she doesn't pee in my bed. Peed her pants when she saw me there! I can't believe that she has such little control! Probably had to wear a diaper till she was thirteen! She went to Impa's office, and she was asleep, with her feet propped up on the desk. Zelda came bursting in and yelled "Impa! Link's friend has been hurt badly!"

Impa woke with a start and fell backward out of her chair. Oommpphh. "OW! what is it Zelda?" Impa said, and stood up quickly. Zelda sighed and repeated what she had just said. Impa and Zelda then rushed back to the room. Link was there, he had put some of Zelda's feather pillows under her hurt head, and Link was stroking her cheek.

"It's okay, sweetie. Zelda has gone to get help," Link said very soothingly. Malon had regained conciousness right after Zelda left to get Impa.

Impa stepped in, and she saw the now gigantic puddle by her bed. "How did that happen, did you spill your water, Zelda?" she asked.

Zelda couldn't give up the opportunity to try to get Malon in trouble. "No, Malon had an accident," said Zelda, fighting back a smile, and Malon turned her head away from Impa and Zelda. She was still ashamed about it. Zelda then leaned over to Impa and whispered in her ear. "She was ashamed, and tried to leave, but she slipped in her own pee. She also pooped. She landed on her butt, and it made a squish noise. It was gross."

Malon then started to cry. It was not because of the pain, it hurt like hell, but she could stand it. However, she couldn't stand the shame. She had heard what Zelda had said, and she could feel it. Impa saw her crying, and went to her side, and got a chair and sat down. Malon turned over, but then saw Impa. She stared into her eyes, and tears began to flow from Malon's eyes even more than ever. She then turned red, and turned over and looked at the wall, ashamed. Impa, however, turned Malon's head over to look at her. Malon winced, because she had touched the tender spot. "Sorry. Malon, is that your name?" Impa said sweetly

"Yes," she said, then sniffed.

"Listen. It's okay that you had an accident. Are you Link's friend?" Impa asked.

"I'm Link's boyfriend. Well, since about 8 p.m. yesterday," she said.

"It's okay. Link isn't going to hate you just because you had an accident, and neither is Zelda. Is your head ok? can you sit up?" she said soothingly.

"Yes" Malon said, and sat up. The blanket fell off her chest, and she didn't have her shirt on. Malon turned bright red at Impa's startled look.

"Why did you take your shirt off for?" she asked.

Malon began to cry again, and Link then spoke up, "Zelda was giving her a tour of the castle, and Zelda then got extremly boring, and we lost her at the stairs going down in the basement with all the paperwork. We, actually I, thought that we could come in here and, well.... Actually, all we did was kiss. We took our shirts off, and we decided to take a nap. I woke up when I heard Malon talking to Zelda," Link said, and then his hand moved to his goron sword.

Impa laughed and said, "It's okay, Link. I don't plan on repeating that again." Malon sat up, and clutched her blanket. "Malon, we need to get you cleaned-up. Where is your shirt?" she asked, then she looked down. There it was, in the giant puddle, and it used to be white, but now it was yellow. Malon's eyes began to tear-up. "It's okay, Malon. You can borrow one of Zelda's shirts."

Zelda walked over to her dresser, and opened it up. She looked around, trying to find one big enough for Malon (It wasn't that she was fat, she was actually as thin as Zelda, it was that Malon's chest size is twice Zelda's and that is something). She finally pulled out a black shirt, and Malon pulled it over her head, and on. "Uh, I think you need a..." Zelda began to say, but Impa cut in.

"It's okay, you can borrow one of mine. I guess you are about my size," she said, and Malon was confused. She looked down, and her face turned bright red. She then sat on the bed, took off her shirt, and waited for Impa to come back, hidden under the blanket. She came in, and tossed her a black bra. She put it on, and then put the black shirt on. "Now, Malon, we need to get you cleaned up. Come with me to the bathroom. Get out Malon a pair of shorts and underwear," Impa said, and Zelda looked back in her dresser, and quickly pulled out a pair of black shorts and underwear. Zelda gave them the clothes. Impa then walked with Malon to the bathroom. Zelda then sat down on the bed with Link. About six minutes later, Malon came out with the tight-fitting shirt and a pair of spandex shorts that were real tight.

Link was looking at Malon with wide eyes. "Whoa, Zelda, thank you!" Link said, and smiled at Zelda. Malon playfully punched Link.

Zelda forced a smile. Why did I have to give her those clothes?! Now the shirt is going to stretch, and I won't be able to wear it anymore, she scolded herself. Then her thoughts changed. Hey, if I dress like that, then maybe Link will like me! But then she thought of what Malon said. He is my boyfriend, well, since 8p.m. yesterday. That means they got together about an hour after the party was over! Did I drive him away? Maybe I did, but I will win him back.

Impa got a mop and mopped up around Zelda's bed. "You don't want this, do you?" Impa asked, pointing to her soaked shirt.

"NO! Is my bandanna down there?" she asked.

"I didn't see one," replied Impa. Malon looked through the ball of the blanket, and found it. She put it on, and she slipped on her shoes and socks. They walked around the castle leisurely, getting to know each other. All the guards where staring a Malon on the way by, and it was really annoying Zelda. Link then whispered something into Impa and Malon's ear. Link went over to a tapestry to examine it. Impa takes out a dagger and a rag, and began to wipe it. She then 'accidentially' dropped it. "Malon, would you get that for me?" she said, and smiled.

Malon smiled back, and bent down to get it. The guard then leaned over, and began to stare at Malon. Link pulled the cord keeping his pants up, and they fell, but he didn't notice, Impa had dropped the super-sharp dagger so that it stuck in the floor real hard. Link then knelt down and tied his shoes together. "Mmmph, this is stuck in the floor," and began to wave her butt around, and the guard began to get mezmerized like a snake charmer does a cobra. Link then undid the lace for his breast plate, and tied him to the wall. Malon then pulled the dagger out of the floor, and stood up. She shook her hair back, and the guard was still staring. He was shaken out of his trance by Link pushing him hard, and he slid forward, and Link tied his gauntlets together. He then slapped down his visor, and undid the lace-up string from his breast plate. He flew forward, and hit the stone floor. Link then untied his gauntlets, and they ran for about three minutes.

They all stopped to catch their breath, except for Link. He had enough endurance to run from the castle to his tree house without stopping. They all sat down in the hall. "I have not had that much fun in a long time," Impa said. "I hope he doesn't stay mad at me."

"He probably didn't even know that you where there, he was too busy staring at Malon," said Link. "Also, Malon, I think you need to change," said Link.

"I like these clothes. Besides, I think you like them too," Malon said, and Link blushed and smiled, and turned his head away.

"I would love you if you where ugly, but I have to settle with what I got," Link said.

"You're so sweet," said Malon, and they started to kiss.

"Why don't you two get a room?!" said Zelda.

"We did get one, but you walked in on us," Link retorted playfully.

"It was my room. You should get your own," Zelda retorted playfully back. She had forgotten her jealousy of Link and Malon in their fun.

Link decided to ask Malon something, "Sweetie, can I ask you a thing about what happend in Zelda's room?" Link said.

"Sure," said Malon.

"When Zelda walked in on us when we were asleep, why did you wet yourself? And why did you crap your pants?" Link said.

"I felt someone poking me in the arm, and I sat up, I thought that maybe you where ready to start again. But then I saw the princess, and I stood up. She had a really mean look on her face. I have this problem, you see... When I am put under extreme stress or fear, I tend to wet myself, and if it is extreme, I will crap my pants too," she said, and blushed.

"Does that mean if I jump out from behind a door and yell 'suprise', you would wet yourself?" said Zelda, and everybody, including Malon laughed.

"Probably yes. I had to wear rubber pants till I was sixteen because during thunderstorms I would wet myself about six times an hour."

They all laughed even harder. "Let's go out to the courtyard," said Link. They went out there, and it was noon, and warm, and there wasn't a cloud in the sky. Link was lying on his back, and Malon was on top of him. Impa had to go back in to finish some paperwork, and apologize to the guard for their stunt.

"Bye," she said, and went back in the castle. There was a small pond in the courtyard, and it had crystal-clear water. There where some friendly, year-round ducks that stayed in the cool water all year. They didn't try to eat the goldfish, because they where trained not to. Link was lying on the ground, with Malon on top of him. A servant had brought them a basket full of fruit and sandwiches and chips. Link and Malon moved to the blanket the servant laid out and resumed their position.

Zelda was starting to feel sick from this. I am going to have to do something soon, or he will not want me. She is going down. Maybe I can hire an assaisan. No, I don't want her dead. I want to feel her suffer, she thought, and smiled. Then, all of a sudden, a man about Link's age entered the courtyard, and it was Zelda's boyfriend, Kwijibo. There's Kwijibo. Kwijibo! Hey hey hey hey HEY!!! Maybe I can make Link jealous! Then he would want me! He would see what the true me is like. "Hey, Kwijibo!!!" yelled Zelda, and they looked over at the man coming from the castle. Zelda stood up and Kwijibo walked up to them, and sweeped Zelda up into his arms. He kissed her on the cheek.

"Is your name really Kwijibo, or is that Zelda's nickname for you?" asked Link.

"It really is Kwijibo," he said, and sat down, but at that exact second, Malon rolled off Link and her head came to rest right where Malon's head was.

"Oh, this ground is bumpy," he said, and began to shift around. Link's mouth was open in astonishment, and tried to say something, but all he could do was mouth like a fish out of water.

Mmmphh, mmmpphhh, came from under him. He looked down, and saw he was sitting on her head. He jumped up, and she immediatly sucked in air. "Gasp. My, GOD!!! Didn't you see me there?! You could have killed me!!!" she began to yell at him, and he began to back away.

He then got a real sad expression on his face, and he ran back to the castle and went back in. Her rage disapered, and was replaced by sadness for her, too. She stood up, but Link grabbed her arm and pulled her back down. "I will get him. I know my way around the castle about as good as Zelda," he said, and got up and sprinted to the castle. She sat there, still in shock.

Link then came back out, accompanied by Kwijibo. They walked to the picnic. "Ok, is everybody fine?" Link asked, and everybody nodded.

"I am so sorry. Can you forgive me?" Kwijibo asked.

"Only if you can forgive me for yelling at you," said Malon. Zelda then got another one of her new evil ideas. What if those two somehow get together, then it would be all clear for me and Link, Zelda thought, but Kwijibo ruined that whole idea.

"I love you Zelda. I would never leave you for another woman," he said.

"You're so sweet," she said, but secretly wanted to hit him as hard as she could. He took away one of her best ideas. However, she can still use her jealousy idea.

"Uh, Zelda, aren't those your clothes that she is wearing?" asked Kwijibo.

Zelda said, "Yes it is," she said matter-of-factly. Zelda was starting to get crabby. Link and Malon where acting like they had been together for years, not a day, and her boyfriend ruined on of her best ideas to get Link back. She began to get unhappy, and Kwijibo.

"Honey, what's wrong? You were so happy when I came back out here, then, you seemed to get even sadder. You seem mad now," asked Kwijibo soothingly, and Zelda just moaned and turned away from Kwiji. Link and Malon had noticed it too. Link and Malon got up, and sat up on the other side of Zelda, and they formed a triangle.

"Go away," she said, and it turned out that she was crying. She stood up, and tried to run away.

"Oh no you don't, you are not going to get away that easily," said Link, and Kwiji and Malon stood up, and grabbed Zelda in a big hug. Zelda began to smile, and latched onto Link.

Then Malon said, "HEY! who grabbed me there, and why is there hand down my..." Link then winked at her over Zelda's shoulder, and Malon smiled back.

Kwiji then pulled off, and said, "Well, I have to get back to duty. Some punks got into the castle, and attacked me!" he said indignatly.

Malon then got an idea. "Does this remind you of anything?" she said, and bent over with her behind facing Kwiji. Kwiji's eyes widened, then he pulled out a dagger from his belt, and held it ready to strike.

"You are under arrest for assualt of a royal castle guard!" he said, and thrust her against the side of a tree, and put some cuffs on her. Malon then began to cry, and Link looked at Zelda, because she was the only one who could get her out of that, and she could be in prison for up to a year for those charges.

"Zelda?! Are you going to get her out of this?" Link said, because the only reason he didn't take that dagger from his hand and kill him with it is because he is her boyfriend.

"Release her, now. We all played that prank on you, not just her," Zelda demanded.

Kwiji took off the cuffs, and said, "I am so sorry." She then turned to Zelda, and his expression turned mean. "I can't believe you did this. So you have been the one who has been doing that. My father almost fired me from this job, because of you!!! Goodbye, and here is your ring & your dagger," he said, and tossed a gold band at her feet, and the dagger that he had pulled out on Malon.

Zelda then turned her attention to Kwijibo. She need him to get back Link. If she has Kwiji, Link will think that she is over him, and then she can make him jealous. "KWIJI!!! KWIJI!!!!!!!!!!!!! COME BACK!!!" she yelled, and began to cry fake tears, and Link had to go in there to convince him to come back out. So Zelda and Malon was left out there, and Malon leaned down and got the ring and dagger. The dagger was a foot-and-a-half long, very shiny and sharp. The ring was platinum, but you could only see half of the platinum, the other half was covered in gold.

"Uh, Zelda?" asked Malon squeamishly.

"Yes?" she said, and kept the distaste to a bare minuimum.

"D...Did you mean what you said in your room?" she asked, even more squeamish and shy. Zelda just glared into Malon's eyes for a long time. Malon was starting to get scared by Zelda.

"No, of course not," Zelda said, and smiled but didn't mean it. Next time, she would make sure she would pay. Zelda had that same look in her eyes when she had found them in her bedroom. It was of hatred and loathing, and it hadn't changed. Malon could tell that Zelda was jealous.

Link came out, once again accompanied by Kwijibo. He walked over, and said, "I'm sorry..." but then Zelda cut in.

"I should be apologizing. I was just having some..." Zelda said, and then Kwijibo cut in.

"It's okay. I forgive you, if you forgive me," he said, and then they hugged.

"Well, we have a little food left, Kwiji, if you want some," said Link, and he bent over to get some. When he bent down, Malon got a good look at her eyes. She knew now that Zelda wanted Link. She was staring at Link when he bent down, and was smiling. Malon was getting upset. Zelda was trying to move in, and she had to stop her. She was fingering the dagger in her hand.

"Malon, you can keep that. I have three just like it at my home, and Link, you can have the ring. I can't wear it in the castle, because my father says that it impedes with sword technique," said Kwijibo, and handed her the sheath for it, and the ring to Link. Zelda secretly pouted. She didn't want him or her to have that. Then she thought about it, and smiled. She could use it later to frame her!

"Well, I think it is time for me and Link to leave. I want to be alone with him," said Malon, and smiled directly at Zelda.

"Well, okay. I guess I cold buy you something in the market," Link said, and he stood up.

Malon moved closed to Zelda and said, "You can stop staring at him now. I'm on to you," Malon said in a deadly whisper, and Zelda froze. Malon was on to her! She was going to have to go about this differently. "Bye, Zelda!" she said cheerily, and Zelda managed a response.

"B...By, Link," she said, still too stuned at what Malon said. Link and Malon walked out of the castle into the castle village. Almost every guy looked at her on the way by.

"Link, I think that Zelda likes you," said Malon, trying to ignore the people.

"Why do you say that?" Link said while glaring at a guy who was staring at Malon.

"I saw her staring at you," said Malon.

"So?" he said.

"She was staring at you when you bent over, and it was when she was hugging Kwiji after they made up. Also, when she walked in when we where asleep, she said to me 'What are you doing here in here?! This is my room! You have better not have done anything, or I will have you arrested!' I swear that is what she said! And that is why I wet and pooped my pants. She scared me that much. And when I asked her if she didn't mean what she said, she said no, but I could tell that she didn't mean it. She also got mad When Kwiji gave me this dagger," said Malon.

"Well, maybe, Zelda is a little jealous, but I think it is because Kwiji wants you," said Link. "I mean, who wouldn't when you're in these clothes?"

Malon punched Link on the arm. Then a man 'bumped' into Malon. "He tried to grab my boob!" she said indignatly, and put a hand over her chest.

"Malon, he took the clasp to your bandanna!" Link said, and Malon felt her neck and it was gone.

"Link, that belonged to my mom, and it was made out of gold! It is the only thing of my mother's that I have!" she said, and began to cry. Link and Malon then sprinted after him. Malon could run about as well as Link, and they finally tracked him down. Malon pulled out her dagger, and Link pulled out his Goron sword and put on his mirror shield. The small man had a wavy dagger, and a hood on.

Link moved forward and said, "Just give us back the clasp, and we will leave you alone. "

"NO! It mine now. You not have back," the man said, and a strange gurgling noise accompanied his every word. His hood then came off, then they saw who it was. It was a small Zora child! They heard ripping noises, and he flung his razor sharp fins at Link. Link ducked behind his shield. Malon sneeked up behind, and grabbed his arms. She held him in a strong lock. He wasn't very strong. Then Link saw what she did, and his eyes grew wide.

"Malon! Let go!" Malon was confused, because she had him right where she wanted him. Then the fin blades flew back, and Malons arms where in the way of the blades, and they went right through her arms into the slots. She screamed, and let go of the Zora thief-child. Blood was pouring down her arms, and the small Zora's cloak was soaked in blood. The small child was terrified. He never meant to hurt anybody. Link ran up to her, then deliverd a viscious backhand to the small child. The child fell to the ground, and looked at his blood covered fins and cloak. He pulled it off, and underneath all he was wearing was a small pair of aqua-blue shorts. He wiped off his fins, and ran off, still with her clasp. Link took his cloak, and tore it into small pieces. He then wrapped the gashes on her arms, and managed to stop the bleeding. She was crying. He took her straight home.

He got there, and said he would be back quickly. He took his new horse, Epony, for Epona was almost thirteen and was too old to ride hard. He rode to his tree house, and got about seven rolls of gauze. Saria heard his horse neigh when he stopped, and she went out to see what was the matter. "What's wrong, Link?" she said, and looked at Link.

He was throwing stuff on the floor, looking from something. "I need to find my first aid kit. Malon has been hurt. A Zora stole something of hers, and we went after him. We caught him, and the zora flung his fins at me, and I blocked it. She put him in this lock, and the fins flew back, and the sliced all the way through her arms," Link said, and pulled out a small metal box.

"It didn't cut her arms off, now, did it?" Saria said, and felt a little sick.

"No, he was only a kid. If he had been an adult, It would have. The gashes are length-wise, not cross-wise. If we don't stop the infection, we may have to amputate them," Link said. "Can I borrow some of your healing herbs?"

"I should come along, because if it is as serious as you say, I could make it where it will heal in about two weeks," Saria said, and went back to her house and piled all of her vials of fluid and dried medicines she had made from plants in the Lost Woods in a small cloth bag. She was Sage of the Forest after all, and this was her specialty.

She got on the back of Epony, and galloped all the way to Lon lon ranch. They got there, and Malon was unconscious at the table, and the wounds began to bleed again. There was a large pool of blood on the table, and some had run onto the floor. Saria turned green in the face, and felt like she was going to throw-up. Saria went over to Malon, and opend a bottle of liquid and waved it under her nose. She began to stir, and sat up. "W...Who are you?" she said feebly, because she had lost most of her strength to blood loss.

Link went and got a mop, and got a bucket of water. Link then cleaned the floor and table. Saria unwrapped the torn shreddings of the cloak to look at the wound. Link got Malon some milk and a little bit of food, and she was now fully aware of what was going on. "Are you Saria?" Malon asked, and she was getting dizzy.

"Yes, and shh, you need to rest. This might hurt, but I am going to need some rags and a sterilized knife. Her eyes wandered to the knife at Malon's belt. "Can I borrow this?" Saria asked Malon.

"Only if you don't use it on me," she said.

"No such luck," said Saria, and pulled it out, and Malon let out a groan. This was probably going to hurt.

Talon then asked, "Where did you get that from?" he said, looking at the large dagger.

"It was a gift from a friend at the castle," she said. Talon was about ask 'what friend', but Saria inturrupted him.

"Sterilize this, and get me a bowl of hot water," she said. "Also, do you have any alcohol?"

"All I have is some whiskey," he said.

"That will have to do," she said.

"Are you goin to drink that?" said Link, and Malon let out a weak laugh, then swayed in the chair and fell out. Link caught her and put her back in the chair.

"No, silly, I am going to use it to disinfect my tools," she said impatiently.

"What do you know about doctoring?" asked Talon, because he wasn't going to trust just anyone. Saria suddenly looked very mean. Link saw the danger, because she didn't like it when people question her abilities. Link then went over to Talon and whispered in his ear. His face went red, and he then said, "Sorry."

Saria then said, "You need to sterilize this knife," she said.

"How do you do that?" he asked.

"You heat it up till it is red hot, then you bring it to me," Saria said, and Talon nodded to her. He came back in about five minutes with the red-hot knife in his hand. Malon's arms began to bleed again, and there was another pool of blood on the table, and Malon was getting woozy again. "There is a chemical on the fins of Zoras that cause wounds of the person they inflict to keep bleeding and not stop for almost a day before it wears off. If I don't stop the bleeding within the hour, Malon will die," she said, and Malon snapped to when she said that.

"How are you going to that?" she said.

"I am going to have to cauterize the wound," she said, and she was sickened by the thought.

"What does that mean?" asked Malon.

"It means that I am going to have to burn the wound to stop it bleeding. This is going to hurt more than anything that you have ever experienced, including getting that wound," she said, and handed the knife back to Talon. "Heat this untill it is almost white hot, and then bring it back. But hurry!" she said to Talon, and he took the knife back outside to the small forge-pit they made tools at. He put the blade through a small slot on the side and put the knife in. Inside, Malon was siting there in total fear.

"Uh, sweetie? Maybe you should go use the restroom..." Link said, and Malon nodded, because at that moment she was doing her best to keep it from  coming out. She stood up, then felt very dizzy, and she slowly walked to the bathroom. She used the restroom (both, just in case) and slowly walked back to the table and sat down. The effort greatly exahusted Malon. She also left a trail of blood. The wound was now bleeding profusely. Saria wiped away most of the blood, and made a healing gel out of healing herb and aloe vera pulp. She put it on the wound, and Talon came back with the white-hot blade. Talon handed it to Saria, and Talon sat down opposite Link next to Malon.

"Now Malon, I am going to have Link and your father to hold down your arm. This gel is to help numb the pain, but it will still be the worst you have ever felt. Here, put this in your mouth." And handed a small ball of cloth to Link, and he gently put it in her mouth. Malon began to cry from fear. Saria began to stuff healing herbs into the wounds, and pushed them all the way through. Saria then picked up the still white-hot knife out of a dry bowel, and prepared to put it in the first wound. "Now Link, Talon, hold her as tight as you can. She is going to try and pull away with all her might," she said, and they took a tight hold on her arms. Saria then said, "3...2...1..." Then she plunged the white dagger into the wound. Malon's eyes went as wide as they could, and the stench of burning flesh was in the air, and the blood in her wound was boiling. She tried to scream and pull away, but she couldn't then she tried to kick Saria as hard as she could, but missed. Then Saria pulled out the dagger, and it was no longer glowing. It was back to it's normal shiny state.

"Hold her still. I need to wrap her arm," Saria said, and pulled out a large roll of gauze, and wrapped up the wound, then pulled out some tiny little belts and strapped them all along the wrapping and covered the wrapping where you couldn't see it. She did each one tight, and Malon was still trying to pull away. Saria finally said, "Done, honey," and sat down.

They let go of her, and Malon began to cry. She pulled out the gag, and began to sob into Link's shoulder. Saria handed the knife back to Talon and said, "Reheat this, and bring it back." Talon nodded, and went to reheat it.

Upon hearing those words, she began to say "No, please, not again, not again!!! Please not again!!!" she kept repeating, and then Talon came back. He heard her, and walked in quietly while her head was buried in Link's shoulder. He quielty handed it to her, then they both took a grip of Malon "NO!!! PLEASE NOT AGAIN, PLEASE NOT AGAIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" She began to scream, and Saria then put the gag in her mouth. Malon then tried to bite her fingers, but she pulled back in time. Malon began to struggle from the outset, and Link had to hold the arm that was going to get burned. Link held on as tight as he possibly could, and then Saria plunged the dagger in once again. Malon began to writhe and squirm, and then she grabbed on to Link's arm, and dug in her long nails as far as they would go. Malon turned her head to see the damage, and when she saw he wasn't going to let go easily, she began to stab in different places. Blood began to pour from Link, and Link did his best to hold on.

Saria pulled out, and wrapped and belted that arm too. Then they let go, and Malon slumped back. She had passed out from a combination of pain and blood-loss. Link bent over and began to rock back and forth. The pain from her stabbing him was intense. Saria saw the blood coming from his forearm. "Ow, how did that happen?" she asked.

"Malon did it trying to get me to let go." Saria dipped a clean rag into some water and cleaned the wound and put what was left of the healing gel in the wound, and wrapped up his bloody wrist and hand. Link carried Malon to her room, and went to take Saria home with her. When he got in there after taking her back, she saw him and then began to say, "I'm so sorry Link. I didn't mean to hurt you. I love you, it just was that..." she began to say, but Link finished for her.

"...You where in a lot of pain, I know, I could tell. I forgive you." Malon then began to cry. "Don't cry, Malon, don't cry," he said soothingly, and then she grabbed his hand and pulled it too her. "Well, where am I going to sleep?" he said, enjoying her warmth, because it was cold outside, and there was a high wind, and he had to ride into the wind on the way back.

"Sleep with me," she said, and pulled on her night gown. She lay down, and so did Link. Link almost was asleep, when he thought of something he had to ask her.

"Malon, is your dad ok with me sleeping with you in your room?" he asked.

Malon stirred awake, and said, "Yes, as long as sleep is all we do." Link was still uncomfortable, so he pulled out his Kokiri sword and hid it under the bed right there.

The next morning, he woke up, and saw that Malon was awake and getting dressed. She had most her clothes on, and was pulling on the shirt. "I see that you are awake," she said, and Link got up. He pulled on his shirt, tunic, and shorts, then strapped on his swords and Mirror shield. Link then was about to leave the room, and he felt the ring in his pocket. It didn't even fit onto his pinkie, but it looked just the right size for Malon's ring finger. Then Link felt something in him. Maybe that was why he gave it to Link. As he looked closer, it had thousands of detailed engravings. They where of horses, birds, animals, and of the mythical creatures of Hyrule. And they where all in 3-D, like almost all Hylian art. Link then decided to ask her, but he would do it at the palace, so that Zelda would know that he was hands-off. He looked at Malon, and she had put on a tight black shirt, with even tighter white tights. Link began to drool. "I see you like them," Malon said, and Link snapped back into reality.

"Malon, let's go to the castle again today," said Link.

"Why? Do you go there everyday?!" she asked, wondering.

"No, it just, well, will you come?" Link pleaded.

"I don't know..." she said.

Then Link said, "You give me no choice," he said, then he plopped on his knees, shuffled to Malon and grabbed her around the waist. "Please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please please???" They left the room, and went to breakfast. After eating a good breakfast, they went out. They walked across Hyrule field, and went into the castle village. The usual stares followed Malon, and Link decided to ask her something. "Malon, why do you dress in those clothes, if people are just going to stare at you?" Link asked.

"I do it for you, Link. NO other reason," she said, and smiled at Link. They passed a cart, and she bought some tomatoes. "Aslo, if you want to hit someone with a tomato, you can just throw it, and they won't move until it's too late." She threw a exceptionally squishy one (that was the one she was looking for, and the dealer was happy about that) at a man staring at her from a porch. The tomato busted on the man's head, and Link and Malon ran away, down a small alley of a house, and ran into something and they both fell. They stood up, and they had tripped on a small Zora child, one who had a black eye, and looked oddly familiar.

"You!" Link gasped, and the small child cowered down, afraid that they would starting hurting him.

"You okay! I so sorry for hurt you. Please, no hurt. I not mean to hurt," the small child said, and began to cry. "Listen, me sorry for stealing. You take back if you not hurt Illona," the little boy said, and handed her the clasp. His hand was shaking.

"Listen, Illiona, right? You can come with us. We wouldn't want you to stay on the street," Link said. He stood up, and limped over to Link.

"What happend to your leg?" asked Malon, because there was a large gash on it going from right below his knee.

"After blade cut you arm, you fall, and you dagger cut leg, then you hit head, and I ran back to my alley," Illiona said.

Link said, "Sorry about that, would you like to come back with us?" Link asked.

"To where? you house?" the child asked. Link nodded, and the child's eyes brightened up, and they began to water with happiness. "Thank you! oh, Thank you! Me in you debt! What can I do to repay you?" Link then had an idea, because if Malon said no, then Zelda would be all over him. He whispered to the child, and Malon was wondering what was going on. Link then turned to Malon, knelt on one knee, and the small child got in front of Link, and then Link began to speak.

"Malon, you are right. Zelda does like me, and at my birthday party, she said she had a 'surprise', so I went up to her room. She said 'to close my eyes'. So I think that maybe she had a cool birthday present, because, she was my best friend, and knows me better than anyone. So she says 'open your eyes' and guess what she had done? She had taken all of her clothes off!" Link said, and Malon was shocked, she wanted to slap him, but she decided to be rational.

"What did you do?" she asked.

"I ran like hell! I loved her, but only as a friend. I opend the door, and Impa was right there! She saw me and Zelda, then she attacked me, and I went home after escaping from Impa when she got me and put her knife to my throat. I talked to Saria, and I went back to give Zelda the chance to apologize. She did, and so did Impa. I told her that I love her, but only as a friend. She said that was okay, and I believed her. But now, I am sure that you are right. So there is something that I have to ask you." Link then whispered in Illona's ear, and he reached in his shorts pocket and grasped the ring. "Malon, will you marry me?"

Malon was shocked beyond belief, and then she found her voice. "Yes, Yes! I will marry you!" she said, and hugged Link tight. "Okay, here is my plan. I propose to you again at the castle, and Zelda has no choice but to stay away. We have to get married as soon as possible. Tomorrow is good for me, what time is good for for you?"

"Well, anytime is good for me, even today," said Malon.

"We could ask the king to do it! He said that I was 'forever in your debt.' This would be perfect!" Link said.

Malon agreed with Link. "I could ask Zelda to be my maid of honor!" said Malon, but then Illona spoke up.

"I not want to ruin time at castle, I will stay here while you go," he said.

"You can come with us, after all, if you are going to be part of our family." Link said, and Illon's eyes begann to tear-up.

"Me never have family long as I rember, me only rember name. I will go," he said, and they went on to the castle. Illona was shocked by alll the luxury, and then Zelda ran up to them, and suddenly remebered something from his past. He remembered a girl in fancy clothes, surronded by guards. Illona saw a fancy gold clasp on her neck, and Illona ran up to her, and in one motion sliced off the clasp with his fins, but also slashed her neck. There was blood running down her side, and she had passed out with shock. The guards were stunned, and then Illona jumped into the river and sped off with the speed of a Zora, clasp still in hand. Illona a jerked back into reality, and Zelda looked at the small child. Her eyes widened, and then she put her hand to a scar on the side of her neck.

"Guards, seize this Zora!" she yelled, and about six guards ran up, with swords drawn. Link and Malon's eyes where wide with shock, but Illona wasn't going to be taken without a fight. He shot a fin at one guard, and it bounced off his blade, and twisted and broke his wrist. He sent another at the guard beside him, and slashed him in the shoulder, and he dropped his spear. Illona then tried to run off, but Link grabbed him by his rubbery arm. Illona struggled for a moment, then stopped and began to cry.

"What is going on princess?" Link asked, holding on to the wailing child. The guards tried to take the child, for some of them had witnessed the robbery.

"He did this," Zelda said, and showed them the large scar on the side of her neck.

"Why didn't you tell me you did this?" asked Link.

"M.Me did not rember. Me only rembered when me saw her. Me not rember a lot of things," the child said, and then latched onto Link with a vise-grip. "Don't let them take me. Me not want to happen again," said the child.

"What do you mean, 'again'?" asked Link.

"As I said, me forget things, but me rember something from when me little. I rember beeing in castle that be full of water. Me rember mom and dad. Well, I rember bunch people like me come in, and they began to fight. They kill mom and dad, but capture me. I escape later, and came to village, for they not want to come out of water," he said.

Zelda then gasped. "You are son of the king Zorfkgknmtropcgnjdsdhlfkajhsrliawheruhfkjdhlkashfasufawhrewlieeluhghfhsa-
fhhdiuieurhrrheueidkdjcvkihfdiuhihwileuahdsfjhalsdhfajkvasdfaadsfhiahshfuehwueriwheriuwhirahurehdihwerhpoop the CCLXVI!" she said, and sucked in air. Then Zelda said, "You better not ever do that again! IF you ever do that to anyone else, I will have your head chopped of!!!"

Malon and Link where shocked by her behavior. Then Impa came, and saw the child. She glared at him, then took the injured soilders. They went out to the courtyard, and then Link gave Malon the sign. Malon layed out on the grass, and all the guards shifted their stare towards her. Then Link said, "Malon, you know I love you and..." Link continued in that vein for some time, then came the important part. "Malon, will you marry me?"

"Yes!" she said, and passionately kissed Link for a while. Link's hands where going were they probably shouldn't. "That feels good." she said, and they lay down on the grass, Malon on top of Link. Zelda was getting mad. No one was paying attention to her. She layed out on her back, and acted like she was asleep. She layed down where her head was on the side of a small hill, and her legs where pointing down. Zelda then spread her dress out where none of it was under her. Then she began to relax, and let it flow. They stood up, and then they saw her doing it. They saw the stream running out from under her dress. Zelda never wears underwear, so nothing was soiled. However, her butt was getting itchy. They watched it go down the hill. Zelda then yawned, and stood up. Zelda's dress got staticy, and stuck up that way and you could see half of her behind. All the guards shifted there gaze. Malon and Link began to laugh, and Zelda didn't know what was so funny.

"The back of your dress is stuck. We didn't know you didn't wear underwear!!!" she said, and Zelda's face went red. She put the back of her dress down, and the guards began to stare at Malon again.

"She wet herself. Why did she do that?" asked the ten-year old child.

"I guess she just had to go, or she was trying to get attention to herself," said Link frowning, because that was just the sort of thing she would so. She had often resorted to the ejection of bodily fluid and solids to get out of things or get attention. Once, Impa wouldn't pay attention to her when she was six, she stood on her head, and wet herself. Impa saw it, and then it went into Zelda's eyes. It burned, and Zelda's armed buckled from the pain, and she fell on her head, unconscious. She had once had to go to the bathroom when they were taking Zelda somewhere in a carriage, and Impa refused to stop, because she said it isn't royal-like to stop to use the restroom. "You are just going to have to hold it. You are almost grown-up, you can hold it," said Impa. Zelda had to go the bathroom, then acted like she was asleep, and used both of them as much as she could, while lying on her stomach. Impa then opend the door when they got there, just to see the sleeping Zelda, asleep on the seat, but saw the urine dripping down off the side of the seat, and a putrid smell met her nose. Impa thought that was an actual accident, and actually apologized. Of course, the habit developed when she was little, she would have to sit in with the king when she was five, and she would just stand-up and squat-down to do whatever she needed to do. King Harikinian never liked it, when he looked over to hear a pattering noise, and see Zelda squatting down, and smell the stench coming from her. Impa would always take her out, then, they made her wear a diaper to them, because Zelda always told them that 'she couldn't hold it.' She kept up the charade until she was seven.

Malon and Link laughed. They went inside, and went upstairs. Malon had taken of the belts, and Zelda could see the bandages. "Guess what, Zelda?" said Link and Zelda turned to him, and she was in one of her 'royal bitch' moods. She was the most spoiled person that Link knew. The only reason she got away with the stuff she did when she was little was because she was the princess. Zelda lost her virginity when she was thirteen. However, only he knew that, and that was because he walked in on them. She had ordered Link not to say anything.

Link then said "We are going to adopt Illona."

"Yeah, whatever," she said, getting visably mad. "Malon, what happened to your arms?"

Malon then responded, "Illona did it before we met him, he robbed me."

Suddenly, Link and Malon remembered what Zelda had said. Their eyes widening, they began to speak, but then Zelda grabbed a hold on Illona and yelled, "GUARDS, THE ZORA HAS ATTACKED ANTOHER! I HAVE HIM IN MY ROOM!!! COME AND SIEZE HIM!!!" Illona looked into her eyes. He could tell that she didn't do it to punish him, but to punish Malon. He began to struggle and cry, then he punched Zelda with his free hand. He lept across the room and grabbed Link's small Kokiri sword, and pulled out his wavy dagger. There where four guards at the door, and they saw the place where his fin cut Zelda when he punched her. She had the bed sheet against her shoulder, and the guards already had their swords drawn, and moved toward Illona. He shot two fins at the guards, and it went straight though their chests, and they dropped dead on the spot. He then shot forward, and with two quick sweeps, decapitated the guards. He them put away his wavy dagger and took one of the guard's Hylian shields, and a cloak and scabbard for the sword. He was a really good fighter.

"Me have go, princess no like me. Me go live in streets again. Princess only hurt you if you follow. Sorry me get to be family," Illona said with tears in his eyes, and ran off, but then Impa appeared in the hall. She saw the decapitated bodies lying in front of Zelda's room, and saw the child with blood on his arm fins.

"I knew you where nothing but trouble!!!" said Impa, and flung her two daggers at Illona. Link watched in terror. He began to run towards them, but then Illona shot off his fins again, and they where heading straight for the daggers. They hit the daggers, and the daggers suddenly went into the wall. His fins returned, and Impa drew a sword and charged Illona. However, when Illona was little, he was taught Zora sword fighting. It was as old as them, and almost unbeatable. Illona spun under a jab from Impa and stabbed his sword through the side of Impa's cheek. Then he stabbed her in the lower abdomen, and Impa fell to the floor. Impa then raised her sword, trying to get Illona, but collapsed on the floor, lying in a pool of blood. Zelda staggered into the hallway, and saw Illona right after he stabbed her in the cheek, and then she saw him stab her in the stomach. Zelda ran up to Impa, and Illona was shocked beyond belief of what he just did.

"YOU SON OF A BITCH!!!" she screamed, and tried to swing at Illona, but missed.

Illona stepped out of her reach and was crying. "Me sorry, she attack me first," he said, and his arm fins got bigger, and he leapt out of the window, and glided off.

Link yelled to Malon ,"I am going to get Illona, I will be back. I will meet you at your house when I have got him," he said.

"You bring him to me!" she ordered, but Link wouldn't listen to her. Link didn't know if he could be friends with her anymore, not because he was mad at her, but because she was mad at him. Link leapt out of the window, and transformed into a Deku. He used the flower propellers to follow Illona, and stayed where he couldn't see him. Illona then got too close to the ground, and had to land. Suddenly, Illona looked up, and saw the Deku. He shot his fins at Link, and Link had to dive down to keep from getting knocked out of the sky. He landed, and took off the mask.

"Link! How you change from Deku to Hylian?" he asked.

"I used this mask. Here, Illona, use this mask and go to the Deku kingdom," Link said, and handed him the mask.

"Me can no take. Me no hide any longer. Me fight to stay. Me not going to pretend me is something me not," Illona said, and Link pulled out the Zora mask.

"Illona, I can use this mask to be a Zora, and pretend to be your father," Link said, and put it on. Link then transformed to a Zora, then took it off. "Here, we can move faster if I use the bunny hood," said Link, and put on the bunny hood, and picked up Illona and raced off at about sixty miles an hour. They raced into the Kokiri village, and went into Saria's house. She was huddled up in the corner, crying. Link took off the bunny hood and knelt by Saria, and so did Illona. "What is wrong, Saria?" Link said, and Saria began to speak.

"It's here Link," she said.

"What's here?" Link said.

"Evil ones. Devidra spirits. They have invaded Zelda. I can feel it. They are maximizing her lust for you. She is trying to take revenge on you for wanting Malon. She is trying to torture both of you. I can feel it. I can hide him for you," she said, and stood up. She pulled out a small Deku mask, and gave it to Illona. "I will contact Tamil. She can take Illona into Termina and take him to the Deku palace. Give them this, and they will hide you," Saria said, and gave Illona a jar full of glowing green fluid that was flowing around of its on free will, and squeaking.

It then squeaked, "Are we going to the deku palace? Yaaa!!!" it said, and little arms began to swing around.

"What this is?" Illona asked.

Saria's eyes went wide. "Illona turn around," she said. Illona did, and Saria yanked something out of his neck.

"OUCH! Why did you do that? That really hurt!" he said fluently, not jerky anymore. He suddenly said, "I can remember everything now! What is going on?"

"This is a memory compressor. As long as you had this in you, your memory was scrambled. This is a device of the Zoraaoufasdsdldfjksdlfjk thieves," She said.

"Thank you, Sage," said Illona and bowed.

"Just run," said Saria.

Tamil flew up and said, "Come with me, Zora child." And Illona ran off after Tamil. Link then left the house, and then Saria cast a spell that encircled her house with thick Deku trees twisted together to make one giant tree covering her house.

"Bye Link," she said, and began to cry, and closed the entryway into the giant tree-house. Link then put on his bunny hood, and raced back to the castle, fearing for Malon's life. Link ran in, and saw Malon there. She was crying. "Shhh, Illona is safe. He is hiding where no one will be able to find him. Saria hid him."

All of a sudden, she stood up and said, "Thank you, Link. I want to go home," she said, and kissed him passionately, and she grabbed his hand and put it on her breast. Malon then left, and at that moment, Malon came down the stairs. "Link, did you find Illona?" she asked.

"Wait, you just left, hold on," and looked down, and there was Zelda walking away. "Malon!!! She is going after Illona! She just assumed your body, and I told her who hid him! I have to go!!!" Link said, and put on the bunny hood and zipped back into the forest. Zelda was there with a mercenaries, and she had a wicked grin and a insane glint in her eyes. They had Saria, she was magically bound.

"Rape and torture her until she tells us what we want to hear," Zelda had said after teleporting there. The men and women grinned, and took her back in her cottage, and her screams echoed through the forest. The children were terrified, and Link ran up to here the screams, and saw Zelda.

"Come to make a bargain?" said the insane Zelda, and Link couldn't begin to bear the screams coming from her cottage.

"PLEASE NOT AGAIN. PLEASE NOT AGAIN!!!" were ear-splitting. Link put on his Fierce Deity mask, and Zelda tried to stop Link.

"Hand over the child, and we will let go of." WHAK, and Link had broken Zelda's jaw, and Zelda collapsed to the forest floor. Link ran in and killed all the perverted mercenaries. Saria was covered in cuts and bruises, and was naked. Link grabbed a bunch of her clothes, wrapped up his best friend in blankets, and put on the Goron mask. He huddled her up, and rolled off with Saria in his arms, sobbing. Link then encountered a unit of soldiers, under orders to kill anyone coming out of the forest. Link burst out of the forest, and killed all of them, because they where under a spell by Zelda. Link rolled to Malon's house, where she was waitng. Link transformed,and walked up, crying. He had never witnessed something so horrible as when he went into the cottage. He took her inside, and the cleaned her wounds, and put some clothes on her.

They came back, and she was sitting on the bed, staring at the door. She looked up at them, and the joy had left her eyes. She was blank, devoid. Her innocence ripped away, leaving her naked in a horrible world. She saw Talon enter, and she began to back away. "N.N.No, don't, no more." she said, and wet herself in fear. Link went up to Saria, and tried to get her to change, but she didn't want to. "They will come back," she kept repeating, until Link promised he would stay with her while she changed. She changed, and Link sat back down with her, as she let all her feelings out. She then went to sleep in his arms, cradling her like a baby, because she said she felt safe like that. Malon walked in, and saw Link holding Saria, and she had just put her thumb in her mouth.

"Is she going to be ok?" asked Malon, looking at Link.

"I don't know. This is the worst thing to ever happen to her. She has lost her innocence. I hope she stays the same Saria I have always known," Link said, and Saria groaned, and opened her eyes.

She then said, "Dad, don't let them take me," she said, and latched onto his neck.

"I hope she doesn't really think I am her dad. She is almost five years older than me," said Link.

Then Saria said, "Of course you are my daddy. NO one else would have done that," she said, then all of a sudden she began to shift around, and a stench reached there noses. "Sorry, daddy, I couldn't hold it. Please don't be mad at me," she said, and looked sad.

Link then whispered to Malon, "I think she is reverting to a younger stage of her life so she doesn't feel so hurt," said Link, and then a pattering was heard.

"Sorry," she said, and Link took Saria to the bathroom and cleaned her up.

"Malon, do you by any chance have any diapers?" asked Link, not wanting to have to clean her up every time.

"Yes, here," said Malon, and gave Link one. He put the plastic thing on her, and she walked out. Link looked at Saria in pity. She looked like a large baby. She walked into her room, and lay down. Link went in there to check on her, and she asked him to read a story. He did, and went to bed with Malon.

Link lay down. "Link, you are going to have to do something. If this keeps up, she is never going to be the same. She is a Sage, Link!" Malon said, turning over and laying on top of Link.

"Yes, I know. Besides, she is probably going to wet the bed tonight. I gave her five glasses of water. They gave her something that made her extremly thirsty." Then Link rembered what Saria had said to him abut the beast the next morning. "Malon, Zelda tortured Saria to try to find out where Illona is! What if she told?" Link said and leapt out of bed, and went into the room where Saria was at. She was jumping up and down on the bed, and she sat down when Link came in.

"Sorry, daddy," she said, and the diaper made a crackling noise.

"Saria, you are going to have to get over this. You can't keep this up. I am not your dad, and you are grown up. You are five years older than me!"

Saria began to cry and said. "I know. I just didn't know that people could do such things to people. The women did terrible things, and the men even more horrible," said Saria, and the she looked at Link in shame. Link then heard a noise that sounded like running water. "I can't even control my bladder, what is wrong with me?!" she said, and Link looked down. The front of her diaper was tinted slightly yellow.

"It's ok, Saria. You are just in shock, I guess. Just don't stop being your joyous self. I loved that about you," Link said, and took Saria in the bathroom. "Here are some more, because I don't want you embarrassed," Link said, and began to cry. "Saria, I told Zelda. She had taken on the form of Malon. I told her that it was you who had hid him. I am sorry."

Saria knew the hypnotic powers of the Devidra, and knew that the amount of spirts in her was to much for even the strongest mind. "It's ok, go on. I can change myself," she said, and smiled the first true smile since the torture.

"Did you tell Zelda where Illona is hidden?" Link asked.

"No, Link," she said. "Link, Illona is going to be the new sage of the forest. I can't do it anymore," she said, and closed the door.

Then Link went back to Malon's room, where she was getting dressed. "Yes, she's safe," said Link, and then Link got his stuff, and Saria called out to him.

"Link, he has the power of the sage right now! He is needed to destroy the evil. Get all the sages, and gather at the castle. I will use my power to shield it from the evil," she said, and she got on the horse, and so did Malon. Epony did not like the extra weight, and it was hurting her.

"I will get off and use my Goron mask to get there faster," said Link, and put on the mask. Epony then galloped off with Saria and Malon, and they passed Zelda. She saw the tortured sage, and sent bolt of black energy at them. Saria put a seed in Epony's mane, and vines sprouted from his mane, and fused with his body. Infused with the strengh of the seed that came from the Great Deku itself, Epony was able to dodge the attacks, while Saria called to the grass and trees, and then a rustling was filling the air, the talk of plants.

Soon, they reached the castle, and the vines receded into Epony's mane, but it had turned green. She said to Link, "Epony now has some of the power of the Great Deku in him. He will be able to live for hundreds of years. He also is as intelligent as you, just can't talk," she said and patted the horse.

They went inside, and the other sages where assembled, including Impa, who survived the attack and was in a wheelchair. She then said, "Evil Devidra spirts have invaded Zelda. I don't have the power I used to, and the new forest sage is to be Illona, the prince of Zoras," said Saria. "Link has to go to Termina and get Illona and bring him back." Saria then searched them all telepathically, and they all were the true sages. "Link, we will transport you to the Deku palace, and transport you back," she said, and before he knew what he was doing, he was in the Deku palace, surronded by Deku people.

"Link!" said a shrub, then turned into a Zora. Illona had since lost his boyish look, and had fierce eyes, and held himself like a prince. The little green thing was bouncing around the bottle.

"I like it here! Deku people so funny looking! Me want a Deku nut!" it said, and Illona dropped one in. It surronded it, and glowed green. "Yea!!!" it squeaked, ecstatic. Link then grabbed on to Illona, and in a flash of light, they where back.

Saria was standing, trying to keep her back to everyone. "Why are you trying to keep your back turned?" asked Link.

Saria then whispered in his her, "I tried to find a bathroom, but couldn't find one. It all came out before I could find one," she said, and began to cry. Link hugged her, and saw what she was talking about. There was a large lump in the back of her short shorts, and then Malon walked up.

"What is wrong Link?" she asked.

"Saria had an 'accident.' Did you bring any extra?" Link asked.

Malon then looked in the bag and said, "Yes I do. Come with me, Saria."

"Why was she crying?" butted in the female Zora princess. She was the noisiest.

"Saria was tortured by Zelda, trying to get Illona's location," said Link.

That shut her up about that. "Who is this Zora? Is he the sage?" she asked.

"I am prince Illona of the Zora," Illona said.

"Hah, as if, I am the royal family!" she said.

And then Illona said, "Your mother and father murdered my whole family," said Illona, and Illona hit her in the face. She fell back, and he drew out Link's sword. "I have been taught the Zora sword techinique. If you want me to, and can cut you limb from limb you." said Illona in rage, because the spell that was cast when his family was murdered. It repressed the part of his soul that expressed bravery. He was now letting his feelings out for the first time. The stunned princess didn't know what to say.

Link ran up to Illona, and said, "Illona, we have to work together right now, ok?" Link said, shocked his behavior.

Saria walked up, after returning with Malon and said, "We have retrieved the Master Sword for you. Take this substance, and smear it on the sword. You have to stab Zelda with this to release the evil. She will then return to normal," Saria said, and handed the jar that was with Illona, and the Master Sword.

The stuff said, "Oh, shiny sword!" Link unscrewed the bottle, and smeared it on the sword.

"This is the essence of happiness and goodness, given to me by the great Dekus from the very center of the forest. The essence will extract the evil. However, we have to return it after we are done," she said.

The rest of the essence said, "They no fun. They don't want to play, me have to play with other blobs."

"They live in lakes and ponds, often only two or three to a pond. At the center of the forest, billions live in pools and lakes and meadows. They love sunlight, and love to play. Their favorite treats are Deku nuts," she said, and it jumped out and landed on her shoulder.

"You look sad," it said, and sat there. Saria then picked it up and put it back. Link then took out his invisibilty mask (just given by the sages). He journeyed out of the castle, and went to where he last saw the princess. He saw her, kissing a beautiful woman. The manic glint in her eyes had changed, and her eyes were completely white, and she talked in an insane tone. She then stabbed the woman, and started doing things to her body that made Link want to throw up. She was doing things that where perverted, and evil. Worst of all, she wasn't dead. He had paralyzed her, and he could see the terror in her eyes. She suddenly sensed something.

"I sense the essence of goodness," she said, and tossed the limp body aside. "Ahh, It's you Link," she said, and flung a rock at Link, and it hit the mask and it shattered. "That's better, you weren't going to stab me in the back, were you?" she said in a tone, and pulled out a small dagger. She charged Link, and Link stabbed at her, and got her in the leg. She screamed, and black blood oozed out. The essence was torturing her wound. She stood, and suddenly, she shot magic at Link. He raised his shield, and it bounced off. She then charged again, and Link stabbed her in the stomach. The essence rapidly went through her system, and in a ear-splitting scream, the evil left her body, the three Devidra spirts lookig at Link, and then vanished into the forest. Link then carried back the wounded woman and Zelda back to the castle as a Goron.

Link went into the room where all the sages were, and laid the limp bodies of the two on a table. The king came up. He saw her bloody body. The sages gathered around, and Saria and the others cast a spell on them, and their wounds sealed-up, and they both sat up. The woman, she had raven-black hair, looked at Zelda. Zelda began to cry, and Link knelt down to Zelda. "It isn't your fault, Zelda." Link began, but Zelda cut him off.

"I know, but I enjoyed the things I did. The things I did to her, I liked it, and would do it again. I don't know what is wrong with me, but I liked kissing her. Last night, I did things I never thought I would do, never knew I could do, but I would do it again," Zelda said, and sobbed into Link's shoulder. She then looked at Saria and said, "I don't know what to say to you, and I can't possibly begin to try," she said, and then said, "I want to sleep." And Impa led Zelda to her room. Saria looked at her in shock, as did the others. Evil spirits did this to one of their own. And it could have happened to them.


That was fun while it lasted, said the monster of hatred.

Last night was fun, said the monster of lust.

We almost beat that kid last night. Maybe we should try to find someone else who we can control easier, said the monster of rage.

Maybe that new Zora sage, said the hatred monster.

You fool! Haven't you seen? His hatred has diminished, and he is at peace once more, his hatred is only slight at that of the false royal family, said the monster of rage.

No, we need someone with deeper hatred. The former sage, the Kokiri. She is emotionally damaged at the deepest level. We can take her and do whatever we want, said the monster of lust with glee.

Yes you are right! Lets go. said the monster of hatred, and headed for her small house, three months after the incident.