New Fan Works
Old Fan Works
"Link Sues Bill Gates!"
Link Sues Bill Gates!
Link slammed his newspaper down. "I hate X-box!" he shouted.
"I know, Link," sighed Navi, "you've been complaining about it ever since that article appeared in the paper."
''Navi, I'm not gonna let a big push-over like Bill Gates try to stomp all over Shigeru Miyamoto's fantastic work!" Link said as he brushed a tear from his eye. "Mr. Miyamoto was my daddy, he created me and you, and Malon, and Zelda, and Ganondorf, and Saria-"
"Get over it Link! We'll go get all the major Zelda characters and sue Bill Gates!" screamed Navi, as she pulled him out of the house.
"-and Impa, and Ruto, and
Darunia," Link continued.
"Impa! Look at this article in the newspaper!" called Zelda.
Impa came running out of the kitchen, carrying a dish and a wet washing rag. "What is it now, Princess?" she sighed.
"Bill Gates is trying to beat Game Cube," moaned Zelda.
Suddenly, Link burst into the room. "Hyrule Court now! We're gonna go sue Bill Gates!" he cheered.
"Yippee!" cheered Zelda, "I'll call all the major Zelda characters!" So, Zelda got out a phone and called everyone. "All right then, Link, let's get going!" she said.
"Wait for me!" shouted Impa.
Malon was pushing her dad in a wheelbarrow. "You just had to take a nap right now, Dad, ya just had to take a nap," she muttered angrily.
Soon Hyrule Court came into view. Malon ran over to the court as fast as she could. When she got there, she started to look for a place to park her dad.
"Now, let's see," said Malon, "ahh,here it is!" A big sign said: Park big, fat, lazy oafs here. Malon grinned and used a bike lock to chain her dad to a free post. "Now that that's taken care of, I'm gonna go sue Bill Gates!" she cheered and ran into the court.
"All right then, major citizens of Hyrule and *sigh* Bill Gates, we are gathered here today because Bill Gates is irritating all of us with his new X-box," said the Hyrule Court Judge. Bill Gates glared nastily at the judge. "Link, what's your opinion to this?" asked the H.C.J.
"Well, Bill Gates is making a Star Wars game for X-box, now he's trying to make himself better than George Lucas! Bill Gates is trying to spoil George's fantastic work! Star Wars was always fit for the big screen and the big screen only-not a cheap, sucky console like the X-box!" yelled Link.
"Mmmm-hmmm, that's a good explaination, Mr. Link," purred the H.C.J. "Now, Zelda do you have anything to say?"
"Well, judge, I have a Game Cube here and I'll show how it totally whips X-box's ass!"
"Are you sure that X-box even has an ass?" asked Malon.
"It's a figure of speech, Malon," sighed Zelda.
"Now let's get ready to rock!" cheered Ruto.
Zelda plugged the Game Cube in, and a picture of Ganondorf and Link fighting appeared on the screen. "Now watch the magic!" she exclaimed. On the screen, Link and Ganondorf clashed their swords.
"Whoa, we look good on Game Cube, and look at how excellent we fight!" exclaimed Ganondorf.
"I totally think that Game Cube is better!" exclaimed Darunia.
"All right, you had your fun," growled Bill Gates, "now prepare to be amazed at my X-box!"
"Oh brother," sighed Saria.
Bill plugged the X-box into the computer, but all it did was make a few weird sounds and then blew a fuse. "What a cheap scape!" roared Darunia.
"Bill Gates has been found guilty, now officers, arrest him!" commanded the H.C.J.
"No! You can't do this! I'm rich! I can't be arrested!" screamed Bill Gates.
"Your X-box has only been a plan to steal money, and that's wrong, so haw, haw!" sneered the H.C.J.
"No! Curse you judge! Curse you Link and Zelda! Curse you all!" yelled Bill Gates.
"Well, he certainly learned
his lesson!" laughed Link.