Kasuto's Ramblings

If you are a die-hard Playstation fan, then don't read this article. Just so you know, I am completely biased against Playstation and I don't care if other people disagree with me. If you're and irate PS2 supporter, feel free to flame me. Just know that if you do flame me, I will post your message and publicly mock you. The only criticisms against this article that I will take seriously are intelligent, well-written messages that are made by people with IQ's higher than that of a brick (which rules out half of AOL users).

Playstation 2: A Mockery to All that Gaming Stands For

Say NO to PS2!

      What can I say? I hate Playstation 2. I also hate Playstation 1, but that's another story. I know there's PS2 fans out there who are scratching their heads and saying "bUT kaSUTO, PLaystation 2ROCKKKKS!!!! ITS sooooOOOOOO aweSOOOMMME!!! I STood in line FOR EIGHTY-seven OURS too GETT itt!!!!". That's my point. I'm not going to sleep on the freakin' sidewalk in front of Best Buy for two weeks just so I can be the first to buy and underpowered, overrated, extremely ugly, hyped-up machine. In my opinion, PS2 is simply a piece of crap; and here's why. PS2 goes against everything that the gaming world stands for. What happened to the old days when people bought a gaming system to play...oh I don't know...GAMES! I'm not sure, but the last time I checked, my original NES didn't have a hook-up for cable modems, digital cameras, have a built-in hard drive, and God-knows-what-else. I'm happy with a system that plays games. Who needs all that other useless crap? PS2 makes it such a big selling point that it is a "digital entertainment hub" complete with a DVD player. I don't know about you, but I don't buy game systems to watch movies. If it has come to the point that the millions of brain-dead Americans won't buy a game console unless it has all sorts of useless pretty features, then the era of true gaming is dead. I might be a little biased because I'm an old-school Nintendo fan, but I'm going to stay that way. When I got all the prevoius Nintendo systems, it was because they had good games, not because I could watch movies on them. Now we've gotten to the point where games come in second to the other features of a console. And when the games come in second, that spells death for the future of true gaming. That's what I like about Nintendo, they are putting games first, and "features" extra. PS2 seems to have concentrated more on cramming as many features as they can into that ugly little box.
      Another argument I hear for PS2 is "reverse compatibility." It is true that PS2 also plays PS1 games. Eveyone seems to want to get it because it can play old games. Now, I hate to be picky, but isn't there a system called PS1? I always thought that it could play PS1 games, but maybe I've been lied to all along. Reverse compatibility is great, but it costs money. Do you know how much tweaking and dumbing down they had to do to PS2 so it could play PS1 games? The advanced circuitry and processing of PS2 couldn't handle the less-advanced PS1 games, so they had to make sacrifices. You have to realize that PS1 and PS2 games are completely different formats with completely different ways of working. They might both be disc-based, but the actual arrangement of the data on the discs is different, as well as the discs themselves. The PS1 disc is simply a regular CD, but the PS2 disc is more like a DVD. The way the data are arranged and the compression used make both of them incompatible. So to make them able to be played on both systems costs MONEY. Didn't think of that, did you?
      Did you ever wonder why a PS2 costs $300? It's because of the hardware and being a "digital entertainment hub." There are two main reasons. One, as I said earlier, is reverse compaitbility. Being able to play PS1 games means adding more circuitry which isn't even used for the PS2 games. It's almost like they shoved a PS1 into the PS2. So you're essentially paying for two systems. Another reason is being able to play DVD movies. Did you know that the PS2 and GameCube are both technologically capable of playing DVD's? They can both decode MPEG-2 video, which is what DVD is. But the reason PS2 plays movies and GameCube doesn't is because of licensing. Sony has to pay millions of dollars in royalties and licensing fees in order to get permission to play DVD's on their systems. Also, the region coding of DVD's just makes it worse. A PS2 from Japan won't play American DVD's unless you do some serious hacking. So the dumbed-down circuitry and DVD licensing make you have to dig deeper into your pocket to buy a PS2. Ask yourself this: if you're getting a PS2, are you getting it because it plays PS1 games? Odds are you already have a PS1. So why would you need two? It's just a waste of money. I'm glad that GameCube doesn't play N64 games. People complain that it doesn't have reverse compatibility, but that is the worst thing GameCube could possibly have. Enabling GC to play N64 games would cost so much money, that the price increase passed on to consumers would make it cheaper just to by an N64. Besides, I have an N64, and I don't need another one. I'm also willing to bet that GameCube's introductory price will be half that of PS2's. That's right! GameCube will cost $150! That's my prediction, we'll see if I'm right.
      Wait there's more! I'm not done bashing Playstation yet. Let's not forget the actual appearance of the PS2. In my opinion, it is big and ugly. Now, when it comes to computers, I like boring beige boxes because they have more room for expansion. But in a game console there is no expansion, so it shouldn't have to look ugly. And what's with only having two controller ports? These days, there are lots of four-player games. Now you have to buy special adapters for four players. Do you know why it only has two controller ports? Because there's no room! They filled PS2 with so much crap that they couldn't fit more controller ports on it. And what about the controllers themselves? The PS2 uses the crappy old PS1 controllers. I HATE PS1 controllers. I love the N64 controller because it is so ergonomic and the button postions feel so natural that you don't have to consciously think of which button to press. You just know which button it is. That's why I never play PS games, because I'm constantly having to look down at the controller to find the button I have to push. The PS dual-shock controller is a piece of crap. It has a confusing D-pad, four buttons without names (triangle, square, what's up with that?) arranged in a totally non-ergonomic pattern, and two L and two R buttons. Not to mention two stupid analog sticks that don't actually do anything in any PS game I've ever played. I love the Z-trigger on the N64, it's the best idea they ever had.
      Also, let's talk about the miscellaneous hardware on the PS2. The PS2 runs so hot that it has to have two cooling fans. Two fans! Think of the noise that thing will make. Not to mention that a fan is a moving part, and if that sucker breaks down, your PS2 is a $300 paperweight. Oh yes, I'm serious. The crappy processor in the PS2 generates a tremendous amount of heat, and it must have a cooling fan or it will burn out or simply not operate at anywhere near its rated speed. Guess what? The GameCube doesn't have a fan! It is specifically designed so that simple convection will provided adequate ventilation. The GameCube's shape makes its ventilation work better. Also, the PS2 has a built-in hard drive. That is another moving part. A hard drive will eventually break down. That usually happens after 5 to 7 years. So that means, seven years from now your PS2 might not work. You might be thinking "I'm not gonna be playing that thing seven years from now!" Well, think again. I still have my original NES and original Zelda cartidges. Yes, they are both nearly fourteen years old. And you know what? They still work! Yes, I still play my original Nintendo and my original Zelda. Nintendo built that sucker so well that it's still working after all these years. My nintendo is older than my little brother, and I'd rather get rid of my brother than my Nintendo (if you lived with him, you would understand).
      So in conclusion, I'll never buy a PS2 because GameCube is simply better in every way. I'm sticking with Nintendo, who was there first. They always come up with the radical new ideas and everyone else copies off of them. Playstation 2 is evil, and Sony is a manifestation of Satan (okay, maybe that's going a little too far, but you never know).

Kasuto of Kataan

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